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Controversial Tweet Spurs Discourse On The Nuances Of Texting Back

Humans love to throw around generalizations about the unspoken rules of dating etiquette, but when it really comes down to it, each and every relationship comes with its own little nuances and boundaries. I'm sure you've heard it a million times, so forgive the platitude, but communication really is key. Texting etiquette can be a tricky one, because unlike having a conversation in person, texting makes it possible to communicate something anytime, anywhere, to anyone who may or may not be able to receive the message at the time. This can quickly become a problem of (literal) miscommunication if the texter is putting themselves out there in a moment of peak vulnerability. The silence becomes loaded with uncertainty and maddening possibilities. For some, this can be too much to bear—I wonder what they're doing? Are they ignoring me on purpose? Surely they'd text back right away if they were actually interested. I guess they're not interested. Maybe I'll ignore them and see how they like it. For those on the other side of this anxiety, there are a million reasons why they might not be able to text back right away, the most obvious one being that people are simply busy. If someone's a serial offender of the late text, sure, it could mean that they're inconsiderate or even disinterested, or it could mean that they suffer from ADHD, or maybe they're a luddite who hates phones. The point is, there's no blanket rule for this sort of thing, which is proven in the fact that individual opinions vastly differ on the topic. This brings us to @Arii__876, who provoked an interesting discussion on the nuances of texting after she tweeted a pretty hot take claiming that nobody forgets to text someone back if they're genuinely interested in them. We've gathered a range of responses full of amusing insight on different approaches to maintaining relationships

dating, relationships, funny tweets, twitter thread, twitter memes, texting, relationship advice, dating fails, funny, adhd
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Journalist Gets Roasted After Claiming Horror Movies Can't Be Set In Space

What's up with Twitter these days? Are the blue checks running out of opinions? Because lately the takes have been extra bad, and today's main character is journalist @elle_hunt, who thinks a horror movie cannot be set in space. It all started when @elle_hunt tweeted a poll asking whether or not Alien was a horror movie, after which she followed up with the controversial bad take in question: 'My argument: horror cannot be set in space.' @elle_hunt got dragged so hard by so many people, that she accidentally made 'Alien' and 'Event Horizon' trend on Twitter. While many responded with stills from their favorite sci-fi horror films, others argued simply that 'space' is just a setting, and horror can exist in any setting, as long as there is fear. We've collected some of the spiciest and funniest replies to @elle_hunt's Twitter fail. 

twitter, blue check, funny tweets, twitter memes, horror, alien, event horizon, elle hunt, bad takes, movies, genre, sci fi, roasts, twitter beef, twitter thread, trending tweets
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People Share Heinous Work Stories They Wish Were Jokes

While some people spent April Fool's cataloguing all the brand jokes and PR stunts (ahem, Tubbycoin), DSA Cleveland decided to ask Twitter to share work experiences they wish were jokes. We're guessing that this had something to do with Amazon being under fire for their inhumane work conditions, but there's something about hearing horror stories from other industries that really puts things into perspective. The experiences range from absolutely heartless, to the kind of acceptable shamefulness that people experience every damn day. While we take no pleasure in sharing these bleak realities, it's kind of wrong to keep ignoring the f*ckery that we all deal with to pay the bills. 

Depressing twitter thread about bad work experiences, tweets, bad jobs, bad bosses
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Completely True Stories That Sound Made-Up

Some stories that exist out there sound like they're straight out of a movie. They can't possibly be true, right? Not so - writer Aidan Moher tweeted out the other day asking people to share their most unbelievable true stories, and let us just say...the people delivered.

Interesting Twitter thread of stories that sound fake but are actually true | tweet by MorganPielli Replying adribbleofink went Meetup people w/ social anxiety see Black Swan got there realized had no idea who there Meetup. Too shy ask around watched movie alone checked Meetup night turned out everyone else did same thing
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That One Time People Transformed Twitter Into An Exquisite Corpse Of Comedy

Twitter can often feel like a crowded room full of morons shouting random bad takes and stealing each other's jokes, but beautiful things can happen when random strangers on the internet put aside their differences for the sake of comedy. One legendary example of Twitter being good was that one time in 2017 when @sadgirlkms tweeted 'isn't rick and morty that thing you get when you die and your body gets all stiff,' which unintentionally prompted an epic thread of replies dedicated to keeping up a good joke. We've put the best replies from the thread together as a reminder that the internet can be hilarious sometimes.

funny tweets, twitter thread, exquisite corpse, comedy, funny, twitter memes, gold replies, rick and morty, jokes, twitter
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Uptight Plane Passenger Inspires Funny Thread About Armrest Etiquette

While heading to the festive film-loving crowds of snowy Sundance, writer Rachel Handler found something to write about even before her plane took off. The Vulture reporter took to Twitter when her "neighbor" loudly consulted Siri regarding "middle seat etiquette" on airplanes. The woman turned to Handler with the results of her query: she was legally entitled to both armrests for the duration of the flight. 

While Handler did not take issue with the findings, the manner in which this woman staked her legal claim left something to be desired. And their interactions didn't stop there. Handler consistently updated the thread with more of the woman's entitled antics, leaving people both impressed and entertained by the behavior. While we don't think that Siri should ever be consulted regarding matters of humanity and kindness, the whole thing is pretty damn funny. We're also willing to bet that Handler was anything but bored on her journey. 

Funny Twitter thread about a woman on her way to Sundance. Her seatmate on the flight consulted siri to see what middle seat etiquette is, hilarity ensures, rachel handler | tweet by rachel_handler my first report out Sundance woman next just said loudly Siri is middle seat etiquette then showed Google search results on middle seat armrests and said she's legally owner both middle armrests and am not allowed put my arm down. worked Boeing 20 years so know right legally
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Insecure Girlfriend Inspires Thread About DMs From Jealous Partners

Twitter user @fillegrossier reminded us that even the most innocent of direct messages with strangers can lead to some seriously unhinged jealousy. After sharing an anecdote about a dude's girlfriend getting mad at their dms about seltzer, other people chimed in to share completely unnecessary reactions to innocent messages or even automated game notifications. The insanity (and insecurity) may surprise you.

twitte thread about jealous girlfriend in dms, seltzer ranking | SadeVEVO @fillegrossiere woke up haunted by girl DMed on here say do u know my bf said just mutuals don't really know him she responded and said "well read all ur DMs him went look at my DMs with him and they were us going back and forth ranking seltzer | Miss Mortis @MementoMortis_ Replying fillegrossiere Same energy Can not like my boyfriend's pictures on Instagram? Thanks bf is my cousin lol Agnew Delivered doesn't give right
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Twitter Users Share The Most Heinous Food They Bought At Sports Events

While it cannot be denied that people don't go to sports matches for the food, this Twitter thread reveals that stadiums and arenas really need to do better in the food department. Twitter user @elliotwhu started the cringey hubbub when he posted a photo of a heinously long sausage, and asked his followers to share their own disappointing concession purchases. The responses include scarring turd-shaped mounds of meat and an impressive number of sad sausages. The thread offers up some gleeful culinary cringe, but we don't advice scrolling right before a meal. You're likely to lose your appetite. 

Twitter thread where sports fans and twitter users share the most disgusting and cringey food they were served at a match, cursed images, disgusting food, sausages | the worst food you have had at a football match? Here's mine. extremely long sausage in a bun | Cray @joe9696taylor Replying to @elliotwhu Stevenage away turd in a salad
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Thread Ranking Tetris Blocks Inspires Heated Twitter Controversy

I'll be the first to admit that it's been a while since I played Tetris. While I frothed at the mouth to borrow the Game Boys of my friends and family members', the need to seamlessly eliminate rows kind of died down once I was permitted to play extremely cool games like Neopets on the Internet. While my allegiance to Tetris has waned, thanks to TwitterI learned that the love is still very much alive. 

This epiphany occurred thanks to a controversial tweet from @MeganBitchell, in which she claims that the long Tetris piece is by far the most useful. The seemingly innocuous sentiment ended up sparking a ton of angry responses and impressively detailed challenges that kind of changed the way we look at the blocks. Unfortunately, the thread also called us attention to something we'll never be able to un-know: that there's some seriously lewd and cringey Tetris fanfiction that lives on the Internet. But sometimes you have to pay that kind of price to enjoy the kind of hilarity we've documented below. 

Funny Tetris thread, best Tetris pieces, Twitter thread, funny tweets, gaming @MeganBitchell
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Baristas Share Hilariously Cursed & Complicated Beverage Orders

When I was a barista at a local coffee shop, I'd roll my eyes at wealthy middle-aged women who would order half-caf cappuccino at a very specific temperature. The order seemed so fussy and overly complicated. But thanks to a Twitter thread started by @INTERNETM1LF, I'm realizing it could have been much, much worse. When she shared an order she received for 30 shots of espresso with 30 pumps of white mocha (WTF) and asked if she could legally prepare it, other baristas shared similarly insane coffee orders that range from incredibly complicated to borderline dangerous. Prepare to be disturbed. 

Funny twitter thread about gross Starbucks and Dunkin Donuts orders, coffee orders, espresso, caffeine, coffe shops, tweets, amusing tweets, lol, gross, cursed images
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Crafty Kid Cons Adults To Get Out Of Schoolwork

People should never underestimate the lengths someone will go to in order to get out of doing something. The effort may seem antithetical to laziness, but for responsibility-averse people, the result often remains satisfying. This advanced form of avoidance doesn't just bloom with adulthood. It's often a skill that is learned in childhood. And Twitter user @mfpiccolo recently gifted the internet with a thread that proves this scheming starts early. The story is about his niece, who like many other kids these days is attending class on Zoom. It shouldn't be surprising that the experience leaves something to be desired after enjoying ones education IRL. But while most kids have opted to slog through remote learning, this 8 year old decided to hatch a scheme that would leave her free from the oppressive bonds of online education. Her plan didn't just work - it stumped adults for weeks. The 17 tweet saga is so entertaining that Jimmy Kimmel had our little hero (and her mom) on his late night television show. But you don't have to take his (or our) word for it. The whole damn thing can be enjoyed below. 

Funny twitter thread about a kid who cons her parents, teachers, school so that she can get out of doing classes on Zoom, Jimmy Kimmel, lol, tweets
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Twitter Thread Exposing Fish Fraud Is Both Eye-Opening & Revolting

We've got some seriously bad news for fish-lovers. According to a report from nonprofit Oceana, over 20% of 449 fish that they tested were mislabeled, exposing some pretty serious "fish fraud." This is a staggering percentage, especially when considering that less than 1% of fish is tested for fraud. There's a huge chance that the expensive fish you're ordering while dining out is cheap - or even, according to this related Twitter thread from a biology professor, dangerous. There are fish out there that will hurt you to eat. And, as @AwesomeBioTA's class discovered, some of this "fish" is almost too disgusting for words.

Eye-opening twitter thread about professor doing a class on fish fraud | Dr.Jen M @AwesomeBioTA Josue sequenced some red snapper put money on being tilapia and right. Someone owes 5. His lab partner, Juanni, sequenced Atlantic Salmon. Comes back as Rainbow trout. Unsurprising. Not same species AT ALL, but unsurprising.
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Twitter Thread Reveals Bizarre Genius Of Painted African Movie Posters

We've seen some funky movie posters from the Soviet Union and Poland, but Twitter user @Retr0Joe managed to completely overshadow both with his thread of hand painted African movie posters. Apparently, due to licensing issues, some African movie theaters would hire artists to paint the promotional posters for their theaters. Most of these artists were completely ignorant of the film plots, so they'd have to fake it. And apparently that means a lot more guns, a lot more violence, and unexpected cameos from Michael Jackson. And if these aren't enough for you, there are tons more to be found in the thread.

African movie posters that are hand painted due to licensing issues, space jam, mrs doubtfire, jurassic park, michael jackson | tweet by Retr0Joe thread African Movie Posters Due licensing and printing costs, some African theaters gave task artists paint posters movies being shown Some artists had no reference movie they drawing so some just guessed Here are my favourites.. SPACE JAM MICHAEL JORDAN BUGS BUNNY badly drawn characters movie poster
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Twitter Thread Roasts The Capitol's Apparent Lack Of Security

The absolute mayhem at the Capitol yesterday has been on everyone's mind for the last 24 hours. It was scary. It was volatile. People died. Politicians are comparing the attack on democracy to memorable events like Pearl Harbor. Pundits are scrutinizing the actions of both sides, and everyone's realizing that 2021 ain't looking so sweet. While it's all very overwhelming, we do take solace in the fact that Twitter is able to take even situations like yesterday's insurrection and turn it into something funny. And that's exactly what @itsmeRachie did by asking the site to name a place with tighter security than the Capitol. Given the laughable lack of security (or perhaps competent security), the thread prompted scads of amusing jokes, with punchlines that not only cover places (Walmart, CVS) but objects that are famously tough to get into, like plastic cake boxes and clamshell packaging. The thread quickly went viral, and is still growing both in strength and hilarity. We put together some of our favorite responses, but by the time you read this we're sure there'll be more gold where these tweets came from.

Funny tweets about places that have tighter security than the capitol | RACHIE Name a place with tighter security than the Capitol. RIGHT answers only. | cake box and Cheeto door lock
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Twitter Cancels 'Bean Dad' After A Series Of Unfortunate Tweets

If you've been on Twitter at all over the past 24 hours, chances are you've heard about the sorry saga of John 'Bean Dad' Roderick and his epic Twitter downfall. If not, we'll catch you up to speed. On Jan 2, @johnroderick posted a marathon of a Twitter thread, boasting at length about refusing to show his hungry nine-year-old daughter how to use a can opener to open a can of beans. In the thread he recounts encouraging her to struggle with the device over a span of six hours in hopes to help her build character, or something. An outcry across Twitter immediately ensued and it didn't take long for people to dig up many racist, sexist, homophobic, and antisemitic tweets from @johnroderick's past. This kerfuffle went so viral, it might even affect the future of Jeopardy! (Don't ask.)

'Bean Dad' is, without a doubt, the unfortunate first main character of 2021. Hopefully this isn't foreshadowing a very cursed year. We've collected some of the funniest Twitter reactions to the whole 'Bean Dad' saga. (Content warning: some of the screenshots of @johnroderick's older tweets contain offensive language.)

twitter thread, twitter, funny tweets, bean dad, cancelled, racism, sexism, homophobia, parenting fail, tough love, kids, dads, bad parenting, controversy, ken jennings, john roderick | john roderick So, yesterday my daughter 9 was hungry and I was doing a jigsaw puzzle so I said over my shoulder make some baked beans. She said, How? like all kids do when they want YOU to do it, so I said, Open a can and put it in pot. She brought me the can and said Open it how? | Abby Danger Denton @mizabitha
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Liam Neeson's Unapologetic Pants Pissing: A Thread

At this point, Liam Neeson is a household name. The Irish actor may have risen to cult status thanks to the Taken franchise and his role as Qui-Gon Jinn in the controversial Star Wars prequels, but he's got another claim to fame that people don't really talk about. And that's his absolutely nonchalant habit of pissing his damn pants. 

While his peeing predilections have been investigated in the past, Twitter user @saint_porgy has done us an absolute service by putting much of the proof into one convenient thread. The responses range from creative (a Liam Neeson pants-wetting calendar!) to predictable (pee puns) but they're definitely the content we'd like to see more of in 2021. Out with the bleak, in with the pee leaks.  

Twitter thread of photos of Liam Neeson peeing himself, piss, funny, pissing himself, tweets, funny tweets, liam neeson peeing calendar | jesus was a juggalo @saint_porgy Love that there's like 20 separate photos of Liam Neeson pissing himself in public | More like liam peeson
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