tweets

Favorite

Assorted Tweets For The Scroll-Hungry Masses

Want to enjoy the brief relatable magic of a well-worded tweet without having to enter the hideous war zone that is Twitter? We've got you covered. These tweets are a great mishmash of exhausted parenting anecdotes, self-deprecating tidbits, and mildly funny musings. And they're guaranteed to help occupy your mind for a solid five minutes. Enjoy!

Funny random tweets | Andy Milonakis O @andymilonakis Congratulations Astronauts left Earth today. Good choice
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Fresh Tweets That Are As Funny As They Are Brief

Want a little short and sweet humor without braving the veritable minefield that is Twitter these days? We don't blame you. The political cacophony is the last thing we need at a time when pain and suffering are being nonchalantly shoved down our throats. That's why we've gathered this healthy handful of brevity-boasting tweets to give you the humor you crave. Happy scrolling.

Short and sweet twitter gems, funny tweets | Andrew Schiavone @aschiavone Quarantine can be fun if pretend committed crime and are laying low until heat dies down
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Fresh Twitter Gems To Amuse The Masses

What if we told you that you could enjoy fresh amusement from Twitter without seeing all the crazies and wannabe politicians doing their thing? That's what our Twitter galleries are all about. We put together these short and sweet gems so you can avoid the minefield that is social media. There's something here for everyone, whether you're looking for memes or simple one-liners. Happy scrolling!

Funny random tweets, relatable tweets, cute tweets, twitter gems, dating, relationships, lockdown, quarantine | drake gatsby @DrakeGatsby Having vasectomy is just real life version putting Sims pool and deleting ladder 7:45 PM 5/11/20 Twitter iPhone
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Adele Reveals Dramatic Weight Loss And Obviously Every Twitter User Has A Take

It's no secret that there's an unhealthy preoccupation with the physical form where showbiz is concerned. Tabloids seem to thrive on sharing poorly-lit photos of cellulite-dappled thighs and speculate pregnancy when a star might just be bloated or is photographed at an awkward angle. Award-winning singer-songwriter Adele has dealt with this for much of her career. After making a return to Instagram to thank first responders and essential workers for their help during the crisis, most people could only focus on her dramatic weight loss. 

As usual, everyone on Twitter had something to say about the matter. Adele's transformation has women decrying the media's focus on the body, people reminding the world of the star's talents and accomplishments, and then, of course, there are the comedians. We've included a handful here, but if you're looking for more, head over to Twitter. Frankly, we could care less about Adele's weight. We just hope she's happy and keeps pumping out that sweet, sweet music. 

Twitter reactions to Adele's weight loss
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Twenty-Six Highly Relatable Twitter Truths

Twitter has a knack of taking those little tics we thought were weird and unique and helping us realize that we're not alone. While these tweets may feel (to some) like a personal attack, to us they're a much-needed reminder of the normalcy we miss so dearly. 

Funny random tweets, twitter memes, stupid tweets, personal attacks, dank memes | Katie Bergey @katiebergey someone sits empty seat beside flattered yet annoyed no one sits empty seat beside offended yet relieved
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Simply An Assortment Of Semi-Humorous Memes

While some of you might not know what day it is, we're still keeping track. Because we're still working hard to provide y'all with some decent to moderately amusing memes. As we ease ourselves out of Thursday, we want 'em to keep your spirits high. There might be a dumb toilet paper shortage stateside, but we're here to promise that there will never be a meme shortage. And that's something to take comfort in.

funny random memes, dank memes, stupid memes, relatable memes, disney memes, lion king memes | were afraid Scar as kid but relate him on personal level as an adult I'm surrounded by idiots. Scar from The Lion King | finally get want but doesn't make feel any better and just ruins life more cat trapped in a yarn ball
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Twitter's In Agreement: How The Heck Has March Lasted This Long?

Let this sink in: It's still March. 

With all the global insanity surrounding the coronavirus pandemic, and all the stuff that happened before sh*t hit the fan, March has seemed like an insanely long month. And everyone on Twitter seems to agree. There's a lot of shock that we're still living the third month of the year, and the shock at how we've come out at the end of it. All we can say is that we welcome April - hopefully it won't feel like an entire freaking year. 

Funny tweets about how march 2020 has lasted a million years | Frank Pallotta @frankpallotta long has March felt s been 84 years Titanic | Jeff B, fightin COVID one bo EsotericCD Today is last day March sense long this month has been and much has happened, Jimmy Carter still President United States on last day February.
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Memes With No Mention Of The Scary Stuff That's Happening

It's Thursday. It's Thursday, and everything is great. The sun is shining, there's a roof over our heads, and the economy is totally killing it. Healthcare and medial supplies are readily available to all who need them, and everyone has jobs. And there are memes. Lots and lots of memes. Memes that have nothing to do with a pandemic that definitely isn't happening. 

Funny random memes, corona-free memes | This is scale will be using everything now on. Boasting guest verse Dr. Dre classic '90s R&B hit features Blackstreet singing like way work B: Hardly Any Diggity D: An Overwhelming Surplus Diggity No Diggity C: Fair Amount Diggity | viking @notviking are kids texting about soup? LOL lots lentils LMAO love an onion! SMH so much horseradish GTG get gazpacho WTF where's french onion STFU soup's ultimate food TBH broth's hot
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Quarantined Twitter Users Are Getting Hot Over Inanimate Objects

Pretty much everyone is struggling with the pandemic, but some seem to be coping worse than others. This definitely goes for horny Twitter users. Quarantined memers have been sharing photos of inanimate objects that resemble naughty body parts and claiming they're about to "risk it all " or "act up." While cabin fever hasn't hit us quite as hard, we definitely appreciate this host of surprisingly sexy everyday objects. We've included our favorite of these saucy tweets, but you can read more about the trend on Know Your Meme. Just don't spend too much time looking at the photos. You might end up as frustrated as the people who tweeted them.

Funny tweets about people in quarantine getting horny over inanimate objects, risk it all, act up, twitter meme | Quarantine Pffft can handle no problem Day 9 sofa that looks like a butt anthony adams rubbing hands | day 8 quarantine ceiling is gonna make act up ceiling lambs cast shadows that look like a pair of breasts
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Fifty Memes & Tweets For Your Weekend Scrolling

The days are starting to blur together. That's probably why the New York Times' Coronavirus coverage always starts with "It's Friday" or "It's Saturday." While time seems kind of hard to grasp, we've got some things that are a bit easier: memes and tweets. This assortment of comical goodies won't make the bad stuff go away, but it will distract you for a little while. And we think that's importnat.

funny random memes, marvel memes, dank memes, funny tweets, twitter memes, quarantine memes, covid-19 memes, coronavirus memes | MERRYJANE.COM Hand Sanitizer Is Not Sex Lube Substitute During Quarantine, Doctors Warn hell happened here? | Thicknos @TheKingofReads HAD Businesses falling apart after less than week with no profits but us poor folks supposed have 3-6 months savings case emergency's. 22:37 3/18/20 Twitter iPhone
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

23 Clever Tweets That'll Keep You Entertained

That 280 character limit is no match for these wordsmiths. Some people are capable of saying so much with so little space. We wish we had come up with these ourselves.

Funny tweets. twitter fun | tweet by jeremysmiles So many homophobes turn out be secretly gay nervous secretly giant spider
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Funny tweet about peoples texting styles, when you're serious and when you're excited | two types of person: when you're serious when you're excited
  • -
  • Vote
  • -

The rapid fire short texts are really annoying, though.