lolwut

Turns out jury-rigging a stereo into an explosive is really just a matter of knowing how to blow a fuse. - Matty Malaprop

CannonFodder, you seem a little burnt about SomeRandomGeekNamedBrent's correction. I'm sorry if he hurt ewe, but you just can't fawn over these kinds of things! - Matty Malaprop

Punmaster ichckid098 wins the Internet for today. Everybody else should just go home. - Matty Malaprop

Can't we just not do it and make a Pinterest post saying we did instead? - Matty Malaprop

I'm sorry, door. This is the one and only time you'll ever make me cry. - Matty Malaprop

Look on the bright side, Bruce! They may be gone, but at least they left you with a ton of dough! - Matty Malaprop

Okay, so this is probably four minutes too long... but I just can't pass up the opportunity to make fun of dubstep, so here it is, natch. - Matty Malaprop

I mean really, how can you hear the lyric "I never needed acceptance from you outsiders / Had cyphers with Yeezy before his mouth wired" and not immediately think of Heidegger's mentor and the father of modern phenomenology? - Matty Malaprop

American Idiots: (n) People who actually enjoy all non-'90s music made by Green Day. - Matty Malaprop

She knows Kung Fu. But you probably shouldn't ask her to show you. - Matty Malaprop

Poachers really are just the deviled in disguise. - Matty Malaprop

Next thing you know we'll be decriminalizing recreational wok. - Matty Malaprop

I don't know, maybe a basic understanding of the difference between a komodo and a kimono? - Matty Malaprop