homophone

Pygmyponyngitis is a silent but deadly disease -- one that ought be feared by all Dental Floss Tycoons the world over. - Matty Malaprop

♪ You can find me on the grange, prancing through the flowers / mami I got the hooves if you wanna take a run / I got some shiny pecs, I got some furry buns / so come give me a hug if you into horsey thugs ♪ - Matty Malaprop

There's a part of me that really wants to be offended by this post. But COME ON. Stayin' Arive? That's GOLD, right there. - Matty Malaprop

Cows come in such strangeways, don't you think? - Matty Malaprop

You think just whine because they are begging for food. But in fact they whine because they're calculating the coefficient AND begging for food. - Matty Malaprop

DSLR meets DSLArtillery. - Matty Malaprop

It's a thin line between flattery and felony, amirite? - Matty Malaprop

We've seen tearable puns on this site before. Different terrible puns, but tearable puns all the same. #Flip-Flopping #ThisIsConfusing - Matty Malaprop

THAT ONE LETTER. THAT ONE DAMNED LETTER ALWAYS RUINS EVERYTHING. - Pedobear Portmanteau

What a horrible thing to say, Pier 73! I oughta sink you for speaking such hurtful words! - Matty Malaprop

I know some people are deathly afraid of shots, but really they don't feel like much more than a quick prick. - Matty Malaprop

Because obligatory Christopher Walken jokes are obligatory. - Matty Malaprop

So I can only assume Yao's dad is High Expectations Asian Dad? Everything is starting to make so much more sense now! - Matty Malaprop