homophone

It does make hiding in a pile of laundry a fair bit easier, though! - Matty Malaprop

It's also very probable that he was on a boat well before the Lonely Island ever were. Just sayin'. - Matty Malaprop

... but only because CPS deemed him unfit for planethood. - Matty Malaprop

Before any of you say anything; I really, really, really loathe myself already for posting this. Thanks. - Matty Malaprop

Thumbs up, tailor tabby. - Matty Malaprop

Violent revolutionary baseball is a dangerous job. You should consider aborting your mission if you want to live. - Matty Malaprop

This is as close as I'm going to get to the whole Kony 2012 debacle. And even then, it's only because I'm hungry and this dog looks like f*ing magic to my stomach right now. - Matty Malaprop

Seriously though, who uses Wikipedia to get definitions of words? Have we really forgotten about dear old Dr. Dictionary? - Matty Malaprop

You're a mmmonster! Tony the Tiger was a good man. A GOOD MAN, DAMNIT! - Matty Malaprop

I remember one time in college when I saw a "Leggo my Eggo!" commercial after having just finished a paper on Friedrich Nietzsche, and in my state of post-essay exhaustion I misheard the quote as "Leggo my Ego!" and was thoroughly creeped out and confused. #CoolStoryBro - Matty Malaprop

What a horrible thing to say, Pier 73! I oughta sink you for speaking such hurtful words! - Matty Malaprop

And for that matter, what about cantankeroustrees? Tenacioustrees? Do you just hate all things arboreal, or just pleasant ones in particular? - Matty Malaprop