... is a lovely Santa hat! - Matty Malaprop

So here's the thing. This is a möbius strip. This is a Mobius Band. DON'T GET IT TWISTED (LOL LIKE A MOBIUS STRIP IS) GUYS! - Matty Malaprop

Isn't it always just the worst that such moments of clarity and realization always occur AFTER the fact? - Matty Malaprop

The purpose of such therapy, of course, is to help these sad souls Halloween their way back into society. - Matty Malaprop

It's cruel, sure, but it's still not the harshest sentence. That would be Helvetica Punishment. - Matty Malaprop

As opposed to the X Well, which has a very strange top-end opening that quite frankly is not efficient in anyway seeing as it can't even accommodate a bucket of water or anything. - Matty Malaprop