'Scuse me, while I Rutherford the sky. - Matty Malaprop

I don't know about the rest of you, but my parents always had a knack for predicting arrival times at places to a T. - Matty Malaprop

He's quite good at it; I'm just upset that he's better at investing than I am! Can you at least force him to give me free lessons? - Matty Malaprop

If the newt urinates on his head, does that mean he's excreting a Newt-on-ian fluid? - Matty Malaprop

This helpful calendar mod is yours to copy for free, no strings attached! - Matty Malaprop

But I'd still drink the hell out of it because, well, chocolate rain. #ThatDoesn'tEvenMakeSense - Matty Malaprop

I mean, in terms of aerodynamics, this kind of tie just seems completely wrong. - Matty Malaprop

If your stunted intellectual growth permitted an understanding of puns but not the memorization of 26 simple letters, then do I have the visual mnemonic device for you! - Matty Malaprop

Anyone know what comic this is from? Whatever it is, there's no doubt in my mind that the writer's pun arsenal is always locked and loaded. - Matty Malaprop