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Did it hurt, when you fell from the arms of that creepy anthropomorphic pole-thing? - Matty Malaprop

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amazing blind Hall of Fame legally blonde Movie poster Reese Witherspoon similar sounding terrigood - 6092239616
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There are no words. I'm dead now. From laughing too hard. - Matty Malaprop

P.S. SERVICE CHIHUAHUAS AREN'T A REAL THING COME ON NOW REESE. - Matty Malaprop

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He also took the liberty of polishing Bruce's shoes while he was out. Miss Fancy Pants is a far funner loafer color than black, after all! - Matty Malaprop

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Petty Opinions People Will Defend to Their Last Breath

We may not have fully rounded opinions on life or the universe, but holy crap do we know exactly how we want the dishwasher loaded. Just take these things people are certain of but have zero proof to drive home the fact that people get extremely passionate about minute details. We'll argue all day about the right way to eat a banana.

petty opinions people are passionate about | NotTheNoogie More not use microwave is clock. Stop leaving unused time on there just have hit cancel button once, damn!
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conduct conducting conductor double meaning electricity glass literalism philip glass semi-conductor water - 4740465408
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I feel like Philip Glass is one of the only neo-classical composers who gets any sort of consistent acclaim... but that's just bullocks in my mind; he's only even a semi-conductor! - Matty Malaprop

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4chan chien dogs four french literalism similar sounding - 6067804928
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And not a one of them complained that day about not having anything to bone. - Matty Malaprop

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advice click dont double meaning Hall of Fame lead up link links literalism punchline suspicious wind waker zelda - 5251839232
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... but what about slightly skeptical ones? Are those okay to click? - Matty Malaprop

Hall of Fame horse literalism prefix quote rorschach similar sounding the watchmen - 5013409024
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He may seem heartless and cold, but underneath the mask he's just a sad little ginger colt who only wants to be loved. - Matty Malaprop