And to Think, it Used to Be an Olympic Sport

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And to Think, it Used to Be an Olympic Sport
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My mom always told me the tug life was a trap. She said there was no long-term appeal for living life on the ropes like that. - Matty Malaprop

Ya R'lyeh

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Ya R'lyeh
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Hark! A vagrant apostrophe! And he's come around to RUIN yet another otherwise perfect pun. CREY. - Matty Malaprop

YEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

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YEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
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He's a grown-ass man, so I wouldn't worry too much. If there's one thing I know about Carey Price, it's that he never has a problem Careying his own weight. - Matty Malaprop

Itches and Clothes

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Itches and Clothes
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You might even say the itch was tickled to receive such a present. - Matty Malaprop

Don't Even Play; They Ain't the OGs!

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Don't Even Play; They Ain't the OGs!
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Yo Naga, I'mma let you finish, but Magic: The Gathering merfolk circa Lorwyn block were the best fish-people things of all time. OF ALL TIME! - Matty Malaprop