twitter

Favorite

Twitter Cancels 'Bean Dad' After A Series Of Unfortunate Tweets

If you've been on Twitter at all over the past 24 hours, chances are you've heard about the sorry saga of John 'Bean Dad' Roderick and his epic Twitter downfall. If not, we'll catch you up to speed. On Jan 2, @johnroderick posted a marathon of a Twitter thread, boasting at length about refusing to show his hungry nine-year-old daughter how to use a can opener to open a can of beans. In the thread he recounts encouraging her to struggle with the device over a span of six hours in hopes to help her build character, or something. An outcry across Twitter immediately ensued and it didn't take long for people to dig up many racist, sexist, homophobic, and antisemitic tweets from @johnroderick's past. This kerfuffle went so viral, it might even affect the future of Jeopardy! (Don't ask.)

'Bean Dad' is, without a doubt, the unfortunate first main character of 2021. Hopefully this isn't foreshadowing a very cursed year. We've collected some of the funniest Twitter reactions to the whole 'Bean Dad' saga. (Content warning: some of the screenshots of @johnroderick's older tweets contain offensive language.)

twitter thread, twitter, funny tweets, bean dad, cancelled, racism, sexism, homophobia, parenting fail, tough love, kids, dads, bad parenting, controversy, ken jennings, john roderick | john roderick So, yesterday my daughter 9 was hungry and I was doing a jigsaw puzzle so I said over my shoulder make some baked beans. She said, How? like all kids do when they want YOU to do it, so I said, Open a can and put it in pot. She brought me the can and said Open it how? | Abby Danger Denton @mizabitha
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

30 Tweets Featuring Amusing Plot Twists

Remember that "They had us in the first half, not gonna lie" meme? Well, these tweets perfectly exemplify the format, albeit in the form of character-restricted twitter gems. The jokes are a perfect example of how you can pack twists and turns into short shows of absurdist comedy.

Funny tweets with unexpected endings and plot twists | Paul Follow @FrenulumBreve licking lips anticipation nervous never done bungee jump before. INSTRUCTOR: don't lick my lips again.
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Advertisement
Favorite

23 Roasty Tweets About The CIA's Painfully Hip Rebrand

It's the first week of 2021, and if the CIA had rebranding on their list of resolutions, they can cross that sh*t off. The spy agency unveiled their new website design today, and it looks, well, pretty familiar. That could be because it resembles a Berlin rave poster, or maybe because it's also strangely similar to the oft-copied art of Joy Division's Unknown Pleasures. Either way, the design job simply aches of the agency's yearning for fresh blood and diverse operatives. It's a look we have yet to see from dry and dull government agencies. But this departure from the bureaucratic design of yore seems to be a bit too intense for the critics of Twitter. The rebrand is now the subject of a whole lot of scathing (and witty) commentary. Most of the humor lies in the niche intersections of art, music, and geography, but we're pretty sure at least some of these tweets will register to your brain as "funny" or "true." And hey, maybe their design will convince you to aid in a coup or two of your own. 

Funny tweets about CIA's funny website rebrand, web design, graphic design, music, electronic music, edm | CIA about to get a 5.2 for its sophomore album on Pitchfork after its debut got a 10.0 and was lauded as the future of synthwave alex @shitshowdotinfo lmfao the cia rebrand is a fucking gold mine | CIAs new branding is like Captain Planet but when they put their rings together, they summon a swarm of drones that begin killing any civilians nearby
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Liam Neeson's Unapologetic Pants Pissing: A Thread

At this point, Liam Neeson is a household name. The Irish actor may have risen to cult status thanks to the Taken franchise and his role as Qui-Gon Jinn in the controversial Star Wars prequels, but he's got another claim to fame that people don't really talk about. And that's his absolutely nonchalant habit of pissing his damn pants. 

While his peeing predilections have been investigated in the past, Twitter user @saint_porgy has done us an absolute service by putting much of the proof into one convenient thread. The responses range from creative (a Liam Neeson pants-wetting calendar!) to predictable (pee puns) but they're definitely the content we'd like to see more of in 2021. Out with the bleak, in with the pee leaks.  

Twitter thread of photos of Liam Neeson peeing himself, piss, funny, pissing himself, tweets, funny tweets, liam neeson peeing calendar | jesus was a juggalo @saint_porgy Love that there's like 20 separate photos of Liam Neeson pissing himself in public | More like liam peeson
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Kumail Nanjiani's Swoleness Inspires Twitter Memes & Debates

Remember back in 2019 when Kumail Nanjiani shared that super ripped photo of himself on Instagram? Well it seems like a lot of people on Twitter don't. The Silicon Valley star had been getting swole for Marvel's Eternals, and his dramatic transformation was talked about for what felt like years. It shouldn't be news that stars get in shape for Marvel movies, but after Nanjiani shared a photo from his holiday in quarantine, people on Twitter decided it was time to do what they do best: debate his physical appearance. 

The photo in question features Nanjiani in front of a plate of food, jaw looking exceptionally cut - to the point where Twitter users began accusing the actor of using steroids. Most of the jokes were absurd and in good fun, but the mockery struck other users as a tad racist. We don't see people scrutinizing Chris Pratt's transformation from flabby Andy from Parks and Recreation to jacked Starlord, do we? While we do think the attacks might be a little unfair, we're really just here for the jokes. If anything, we're jealous of Nanjiani's diesel bod. And more than that? We're psyched for Eternals.

Twitter debates fitness of Kumail Nanjiani, marvel movies, eternals, fitness, physique, accused of using steroids, quarantine, instagram, tweets, chris pratt, racism | Paul Hundred, GED This is going to be a transformative role for you, Kumail ok but no steroids. I want this to be all me We're gonna suck all the fat out of your face, render it into bars of soap, and implant them back into your face to max out your jawline. It'll be all natural. All you | Chris Pratt can bulk up for a marvel
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Advertisement
Favorite

52 Humorous Memes That Beat Watching Paint Dry

These miscellaneous memes aren't that high-quality, but at least we can guarantee they're better than whatever you were doing before. So grab a snack, settle in, and get scrolling. You won't regret it.

Funny random memes and tweets | My tupperware rest their life after eating something with tomato sauce Donald Trump with orange fake tan | Y'all gotta go visit New York promise won't regret view rusty radiators
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Twitter Thread: Chuck E. Cheese Worker Conducts Behavioral Study Using Arcade Games

While Chuck E. Cheese has gotten attention for filing bankruptcy and for their sneaky Pasqually's Pizza debacle, we think this Twitter thread involving the chain is far more interesting. Twitter user @Professor_Palmer took to the social media site to announce that for the past few weeks he's been conducting secret behavioral studies on unsuspecting Chuck E. Cheese game players. The experiments are rather simple, and involve adjusting the use of lights and sound in an attempt to better understand what draws people to - or away from - arcade games. The results? Human beings are really, really, easily manipulated. While this isn't the most shocking insight on our kind, seeing Cary Palmer spell it out in such a fun (and thorough) way has been incredibly informative. And very entertaining. 

Fascinating and informative twitter thread from chuck e. cheese employee who conducted behavioral study using sounds and lights in games to see what people respond to | Professor_Palmer @CaryPalmerr The last few weeks I've begun conducting my own behavioral study in secret. I have been adjusting games at Chuck E Cheese and recording the subconscious response of guest interaction over the week. I've discovered some pretty interesting things. A long thread | This is the game that made me start
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Advertisement
Favorite

23 Cringey Times People Overshared When No One Asked

The internet is full of overzealous posters who have absolutely no filter when it comes to sharing crude details about their personal lives with the world wide web. And when it comes to sex, many embellish the truth or obviously lie about their sex lives to seem badass to total strangers who couldn't care less. Many examples of these instances of unwarranted oversharing are well documented over at r/ihavesex. We've gathered some prime, wince-worthy screenshots from the subreddit if you're in the mood to cringe.

sexy times, sex, nsfw, cringe, gross, reddit, twitter, facebook, funny comments, oversharing, no one cares, inappropriate, funny reviews, funny, facebook, tmi | just had sex NOT WITH CAT WHY DID SCREENSHOT | Aunt Jemima Aunt Jemin ant ma hterlite O SYRACUSE.COM 2 MIN READ Great-grandson Syracuse's Aunt Jemima angry at her removal This is an injustice Ton Enn and my last girlfriend did some really kinky shit with pancake syrup. Just sayin 4h Like Reply
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Cynical Memes For People Who Hate Their Corporate Jobs

Does anyone really like their job? No really, like does anyone wake up in the morning and stretch while listening to the birds chirping outside and say to themselves, "man I can't wait to go to work today?" Or is it more that you don't entirely mind going to work? We're thinking it's probably the latter. Anyway, these memes are for those who think about quitting every day but have the will power not to do that.

Funny cynical memes about work | visual representation trying hold my shit together woman with multiple hair pins on her head | uncle Phil Fresh Prince of Bel Air weird person at work won't stop talking and trying be nice
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

A Smorgasbord Of Amusing Memes Because You're Worth It

How's 2021 feeling, everyone? As far as we can tell, nothing has changed. Except for the way we write the date, which will inevitably take a month to get used to. There was something very cursed and anti-climactic about this holiday, and to assuage the disappointment we've put together yet another hefty helping of memes and tweets. Some are clever, some are stupid, but they all make for an excellent distraction.

Funny random memes, dank memes, stupid memes, funny memes, lol | bless rains down castamere @Chinchillazllla wasn't prepared specificity with which Google answered this long does cat hold grudge ALL IMAGES SHOPPING NEWS VI 16 hours | 2020: ends world's problems: Nileseyy Niles Disappears
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Advertisement
Favorite

25 Amusing Tweets In Which God Seems Like The Class Clown

You don't have to be religious to appreciate this funny tweets regarding God's antics upstairs. From the creation of weird animals to marveling at the mess that He (or She) cooked up, these jokes are on fire. If you're interested in more fun Twitter content, check this out

Funny tweets about god | God are they doing down there? Angel: they are making milk almonds God gave them, like, 8 animals get milk they dont like milk God mockingly tHey DonT LiKe miLk flips table. GOD: 8 ANGEL: 9! GOD shouldn't do this drunk ANGEL: 10 lol GOD: 15 ANGEL *mouthful pizza* 25 GOD: 30 CENTIPEDE tearing up stop giving legs look stupid GOD: ONE HUNDRED LOL ANGEL: LMAO
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

A True Story Of Love & Loss On The London Underground

Y'all ready for a little holiday season tearjerker? While this wasn't the best hormonal read in the world, it's definitely nice to read something heartwarming in the midst of life's craziness. This feels-inducing Twitter thread comes to us courtesy of writer and historian @garius. His tale of a grieving widow's connection to the tube announcements has gone viral - and with good reason. It's a refreshing and emotional reminder that people really do care for one another. You're going to need tissues.

emotional and heartwarming story about woman whose husband did train announcements oswald laurence, london, united kingdom | tweet by garius Just before Christmas 2012, staff at Embankment Tube station were approached by woman who very upset. She kept asking them where voice had gone. They weren't sure she meant Voice voice, she said man who says 'Mind Gap'
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

Cringey Memes & Pics Filled With Discomfort

If you're bored of relatable memes and fluffy wholesomeness, this cringe-packed wince-inducing batch of memes will be seriously refreshing. Instead of thinking about how wonderfully alike we all are, why don't we focus on the people who are f*cked up and all the terrible things that exist on the internet and IRL. 

Cringey, funny, cringey pics | photo of a manicured hand wearing a large diamond ring: Curved him 4 years, dated his bestfriend brother. Had baby by his cousin. He saw something happily engaged! hot face emoji explained in an odd way eyes nostrils
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Advertisement
Favorite

19 English Language Posts That Are Straight Up Infuriating

Let's just get this out of the way: English is a terrible language that makes no g*ddamn sense. If you're currently trying to learn it, then all we can say is, godspeed to you and we hope that these memes will help to make you feel a little more understood in the struggle.

Funny memes about how frustrating it is to learn English | tweet by iowahawkblog Yes, English can be weird can be understood through tough thorough thought, though
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -
Favorite

23 Twitter Users Share What They Once Thought Were Indicators Of Wealth

When I was a kid I thought my peers with Barbie dolls were rich. And people with air conditioners. And I wasn't the only child with a unique idea of what indicated that someone had money. This thread from @cpoliticditto proves that most kids had their own special ideas of wealth:

"My wife grew up thinking that having water/ice dispensers IN THE FRIDGE DOOR was a life goal.  I grew up thinking if you had a basketball hoop with a clear/plexiglass backboard, you were rich.  What are some things you thought were indicators of wealth when you were a kid?" 

The responses are a nice mix of amusing and depressing. While some kids thought that having an attic or a wide variety of cereal meant someone was privileged, other kids thought hot dog buns were a luxury. We've included some of our favorite responses, but there are tons more over at the thread.

Tweets about what kids used to think meant people were rich, wealth, funny, childhood | connectpoliticditto @cpoliticditto My wife grew up thinking having water/ice dispensers FRIDGE DOOR life goal grew up thinking if had basketball hoop with clear/ plexiglass backboard were rich are some things thought were indicators wealth were kid? | Le Ah @lfonten2 Replying cpoliticditto grew up San Diego military housing (old small townhouses) so thought having house with California roof meant were rich dr
View List
  • -
  • Vote
  • -