slang

Air Jordans might be more expensive, but this guy knows you can't beat shoes that are kid-tested and mother-approved! - Matty Malaprop

You won't ever catch me at something like this. Personally I think these kind of people are bandits — the whole lot of them! - Matty Malaprop

I mean, I know in your glory days there was no other soul who could ply like you, but you seem to have gotten a little rusty with age... - Matty Malaprop

No, E. L. James, I do NOT ever ever ever want to lick your lollipop. - Matty Malaprop

And they said he could never make an easy living off his art! - Matty Malaprop

Editor's Note: Heads up, Punmasters! Starting tomorrow, So Much Pun will officially be a part of Memebase! That's the only change, though; I'll still be in charge of things 'round these punny parts!

If you want to avoid any downtime, make sure to change your bookmark to http://memebase.cheezburger.com/puns tomorrow morning! Thanks, and see you all again soon! - Matty Malaprop

Do you think if I shatter a Maroon 5 CD like a Jäger bottle, I'll wake up hungover and realize the existence of that song was just a bad, drunk dream? Fingers and liver crossed... - Matty Malaprop

... and that circumstance would be if his name was Fuddyduddy Fop. #HaveIMentionedILoveTheTermFuddyDuddy? - Matty Malaprop

I really, really, really DNHate this pun. - Matty Malaprop

Fortunately (unfortunately?), man's best friend is more or less man's worst drug. Unless you're a crazy dog person, but that's just silly. - Matty Malaprop

Love LOLcats? Who doesn't?! There are so many more over here!

This is just so incredibly self-evident, and I'm just so incredibly mortified by this kind of mildly fetishistic humor. I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY, PEOPLE WHO VOTED FOR THIS KIND OF THING. - Matty Malaprop

Oh... I SEE IT'S FUNNY B/C OUTHOUSES AND DEER SIGNS AND LETTER-SHAPE-THINGS. - Matty Malaprop

Sorry, I left off the "Poorly" on the end of that title.

If I were you, I'd totally roast this guy for the 'tude he's giving you right now, bro. - Matty Malaprop

Bohemian and rhapsodic aren't the first words I usually use to describe Poe's body of work, but if the song fits, wear it? - Matty Malaprop

I mean, only gamma-enhanced semen could penetrate her alcoholic lining, OBVIOUSLY. - Matty Malaprop

Further proof that the hazards of wiener dog ownership are many and varied. - Matty Malaprop

You can has moar goggies over here!