Please don't eat me

Only Pleistocene Epoch kids understand

This wholesome story about a 4-year-old and her obsession with Angler Fish turned into an internet frenzy.

They're not just for Christmas

Fish are friends, not instruments in generational warfare

Take that

BCE > BDE

You can even scroll on Friday!

Eelby! Drink your juice!

...I don't know how secure my premises are

Bzzz indeed

Christmas is only two days away, and you know what that means? We are singing The Twelve Days of Christmas until we cannot stand it anymore. Everyone knows that most of the presents endlessly listed in The Twelve Days of Christmas are birds. If I had to pick any of them to receive, I wouldn't choose swans a-swimming or even a partridge in a pear tree. I want one of those ambiguous, open-for-interpretation gifts. What is a "lord a-leaping," and how do I get ten of them to my house as soon as hum…

Yee-frog

Too much description

“Which animal am I” is one of those questions you usually don't want to know the answer to. Either you get an adorable animal like a cat, or you get one that truly makes you confront your reality as a human being. When I was growing up and this question came up, everyone would always say that I was a giraffe. This was not a particularly shocking answer, seeing as I was at least 5'9 by the time I was 12 years old. However, it did get old after a while that people were only seeing me for my tall…