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Well now, that wasn't very difficult at all, was it?

I mean, seriously, have you ever really LISTENED to the lyrics of "Grenade?" They exist on a level of absurd not even a warped mind like mine is acquainted with. - Matty Malaprop

THE SCHEDULE SAYS 9:13 A.M. AND YET IT ALWAYS SHOWS UP AT 9:09 A.M. AND MY LIFE IS JUST A LIE :((((((((((((((( - Matty Malaprop

Though I don't think anyone ever doubted his insanity... - Matty Malaprop

... but maybe that's just me. I'm still trying to Seuss this one out, really. - Matty Malaprop

I mean, are they quintuplets conjoined at the boner? I'M INCREDIBLY CONFUSED BY THIS STATEMENT AND ALSO I DON'T THINK I'LL BE ABLE TO SLEEP THANKS TO THE MENTAL IMAGE I JUST CONJURED UP FOR MYSELF EWWWWWWWW. - Matty Malaprop

Mariachica are gonna be the biggest band since The Beatles, I'm telling ya! - Matty Malaprop

Because, you know, that would just be ridiculous. Plus I'm pretty sure only 1 percent of the iTunes user base even knows what it means to shuffle by groupings. And I am not a part of that demographic. - Matty Malaprop