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I mean, sure, you have to squint to read the damn thing, but the joke's worth a couple of chuckles in my book, so eh. - Matty Malaprop

Get over here and play a video game.

The plot for the game is truly amazing. Gere begins his journey living happily in Chicago, but things turn ugly when old friends he though were merely An Officer and a Gentleman reveal themselves to be an Ocelot and a Snake. - Matty Malaprop

Also, I was kind of half-expecting it to be a star, man. - Matty Malaprop

Maybe you wouldn't have this problem with your face if you weren't so overindulgent with your pork spending, Jon! - Matty Malaprop

Check out what's fab funny in showbiz, over at ROFLrazzi!

But can they bend it like Beckham, I wonder? - Matty Malaprop

Now here's the kind of trash erotica I can really get into! - Matty Malaprop

His happy face may still be somewhat gorgon-esque, but at least he isn't Howard Stern... - Matty Malaprop