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He's a grown-ass man, so I wouldn't worry too much. If there's one thing I know about Carey Price, it's that he never has a problem Careying his own weight. - Matty Malaprop

Some puns are worth waiting a lifetime for. - Matty Malaprop

Set humor to ludicrous speed!

... and that circumstance would be if his name was Fuddyduddy Fop. #HaveIMentionedILoveTheTermFuddyDuddy? - Matty Malaprop

Talk about a goose that laid a golden egg! - Matty Malaprop

Stars... rainbows... WHAT'S NEXT BOWIE? ARE YOU GONNA TURN INTO A CLOUD????? - Matty Malaprop

"I love #YOLO." "I knOLO." - Matty Malaprop

Punmaster Sofa-Knee says: "I personally find this quite Whomorous."

Ten out of Tennant, would view again. - Matty Malaprop

Say what you will about the woman, but I'm appreciative of the fact that she doesn't horse around in the parking lot. - Matty Malaprop

It's my birthday tomorrow, boys and girls. Buy me this shirt as a prezzie plz? - Matty Malaprop

WHO'S AFRAID OF VIRGENTY WORLP?????? - Matty Malaprop

Let's hope she's not parked in front of a fire hydrant in the left image... otherwise she'll end up as Sarah Jessica Fightingwithatowingservice! - Matty Malaprop

Also, I was kind of half-expecting it to be a star, man. - Matty Malaprop

It's funny b/c Steve Martin jokes are roughly as funny as fart jokes LOLOLOLOLOLOL!! - Matty Malaprop

But what if there is no spoon? Will Reese simply be ereesed from the annals of history? - Matty Malaprop