Improve! Grow! Memes!

We're not shortchanging you

A lot of people come from the Cole Sprouse school of weirdness. That is to say, they claim they're weird without really being weird at all. If you're lost, let me introduce you to the second-greatest quote from the series Riverdale . “In case you haven't noticed, I'm weird. I'm a weirdo. I don't fit it, and I don't... wanna fit in. Have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on?” -Jughead Jones, played by Cole Sprouse Of course, the greatest quote Riverdale has to offer is the following: “I d…

Memes for the gifted and talented!

Feed me!

Having a sense of humor is an invaluable quality. You don't have to be a brilliant standup comedian to know that! Comedy is highly beneficial if you're weak in other social skills. How many times have you heard the story of the class clown who was able to gain the respect of their fellow students through their sense of humor? I was 100% that kid when I was in high school. I took this John Waters quote extremely literally when I was a teen, and in some ways, I still do! "Anytime you make someone…

Prime.

I wish I could be one of those people who could raw dog vision. By that, I mean the second you open your eyes, you can see the world without assistance from glasses or contacts . If you're a diva of the 20/20 vision experience, consider me officially jealous of you. I've worn contacts for 10 years now, and sometimes I have the creeping inner thought that I should just go and get my eyes zapped. The fact that there are lasers that can easily make your vision good in one foul swoop is so insanely…

I stand in solidarity with the wine mom community . During the pandemic, I was close to becoming one myself. From January to April of 2021, I would go to my local corner store every Friday and buy a bottle of strawberry-flavored Barefoot wine. If that sounds like trashy college kid wine, you would be 100% correct. At the time, I thought buying screw-cap wine was so mature as opposed to one of those giant cans of peach-flavored Mikes Hard Lemonades. I usually wouldn't consume the whole bottle in…

We've got a fresh hot list of memes for one Mr. Randy Om? Is there a Rand Om in the room? Randolph Om, are you present? Thank you, I'll be here all week. Coming up with clever and funny pun names is one of the few instances where I find the art of punning vaguely tolerable. My friends and I keep a list of different pun names we think of. They range from incredible to abominable: Collin Response, Jaqueline Turn, Miss Taken Identity, Patty O'Furniture, Heather Interior, and Cathy Lick. The list g…

Delightful!

Fooled ya!

“Does this spark joy?” is such a weird interior design philosophy. My little rack that holds literally every piece of clothing I own does not spark joy, but what am I supposed to do about it?

Girl, put your random on!

Most memes are not that memorable. They slip in and out of your mind as quickly as what you ate for lunch yesterday. They're unsustainable, and that's the way they were built. We are not supposed to sit around looking at one meme all day, expecting to be satisfied with just that. Absolutely not! We can only sustain ourselves with a regular flow of memes in our minds, with only a few really sticking with us. One of the few I still remember the meme from 10 years ago was The Marvelous Breadfish.…

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