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twitter headline clickbait - 8208936960
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What you're seeing here are tweets from @SavedYouAClick, a Twitter account devoted to answering the dumb questions posed by today's internet headlines (not that we have ever used or condoned such intentionally-vague clickbaiting ahem ahem). With just a few words or a photo attachment, @SavedYouAClick does all the heavy lifting of internet skimming for you, and we're all the better for it.

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news whiskey headline scotland new york times double meaning shot - 6978280704
By Unknown
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I don't think U.S. whiskey makers are gonna be able to handle what happens if they start a war with their scottish rivals... - Matty Malaprop

belittling double meaning headline midget news newspaper touché - 6578362880
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Just because he's physically small, that doesn't give you any right to make him feel small! - Matty Malaprop

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bark disguise double meaning headline literalism part question tree - 5617045248
By Unknown
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If the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, then it certainly doesn't rot far from it either. - Matty Malaprop

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Hall of Fame headline literalism newspaper otter similar sounding touché utter - 5368522240
By Unknown
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Further proof that 99 percent of all soft news articles are just otterly ridiculous. - Matty Malaprop

boston globe contradiction dark headline kept lights news newspaper touché worries - 4960173056
By Samantha
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They were just too worried about passengers blacking out in fear, I guess. - Matty Malaprop

first headline human Iceland member museum news newspaper wtf - 4650953728
By Unknown
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Where would journalism be without puns? Certainly not visiting phallological museums, that's for sure. - Matty Malaprop