It's Thanksgiving, and you know what that means? It's time to eat some seasonally appropriate food like turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, and cranberry sauce! It's so interesting that most of us eat the same thing for Thanksgiving every year. Imagine what Thanksgiving would be like if we drank mashed potato-flavored wine instead of red wine. What if we stuffed the bird with baked beans? What if, instead of slicing congealed cranberry sauce from a can, we sliced congealed gravy? Unfortunately,…

On Christmas Day, customers usually have enough shame to not show up at a fast food place. They ask insecure questions about when the company lets the employees go home. When you deliver the sad news that you're working until closing, they retreat to their table to eat their McChicken with embarrassed expressions. Unfortunately, during Thanksgiving, customers have a lot less shame. They find it incredibly quirky to go to Popeyes for Thanksgiving instead of cooking a homemade meal. Working in fa…

Need these in the US

Do y'all remember when the concept of bacon was the biggest meme in the world? 2012 was truly a time to be alive: A time when memes were so simple that a popular food could dominate the landscape of popular memes for over a year. Now don't get me wrong, I like bacon. It's the only meat that I would miss if I followed the dietary restrictions put forth by the Old Testament. That being said, even as a meme-obsessed teen, I found the bacon thing to be a bit much. The bacon meme extended far beyond…

Just no

It's frozen!?

They are moreish

Delicious ideas

Ready your stomachs

How could they

They're a sensation

It's been a long day, and you've done so much. You've accomplished what many people have failed at: continuing to be alive. Whether you spent that day ignoring your chores and watching Frasier reruns or climbing Mount Kilimanjaro for the second time, you deserve a nice long sleep. Whether the night is young or elderly, you can get some shut-eye . But not just yet. After all, you need to accomplish at least one last thing before you go to bed. Why not consume a story? Consuming a story might ver…

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"The Lord's choice of fast-food."

"I know you're about to make the f*ck outta this Philly"

Pull up