Hang 'em up

“I'm gonna offer a free service to all of these home goods stores—I will go through your Chanukkah section and find your Christmas stuff and take it out. I will help you with this!”

Yummy

Thanks, I love it

Now that the gluttony and ritual of Thanksgiving have come and gone, 'tis finally the season for indulging in Hallmark Christmas/holiday movies. Now, I understand that many of you may consider the “films” (if you can call them that) a low form of entertainment. But gosh darn it, they are predictable! There are not many tropes that compare when it comes to formulaicity, a

My mom is one of those people who goes absolutely crazy for Christmas . After Thanksgiving, she starts rifling through storage boxes for her incredible collection of Christmas ornaments. She puts up the ancestral advent calendar (made of felt, of course) and spends her evenings piercing oranges with whole cloves to create pomanders. She laboriously strings cranberries into garlands, which she then drapes around the Christmas tree and her cozy home's exterior. Naturally, she demands only the fin…

Why are they flying?

You've trained all year for this moment.

Every year, without fail, it happens. Sometimes it's after Halloween , but the phenomenon follows Thanksgiving more predictably. We're not talking about Black Friday or Cyber Monday and we're not talking about the weight we gain from Halloween candy or our Thanksgiving feasts and leftovers. We're talking about the sudden burst of radio and streaming air time devoted to Mariah Carey's “All I Want For Christmas is You.”

It's common knowledge that one of the basic tenants of Christmas is giving. In particular, giving to those who are less fortunate than yourself. If I had to propose a runner-up in the Most Important Christmas Values Contest TM , I would nominate “keeping the magic of Christmas alive for the children of the world."

Halloween was 9 minutes ago, can everyone just chill?! I'm looking at you, Walmart

Picture this: You're a woman in the big city who is working hard to build your cookie company. You have a few clients (most of whom you've known a long time, and happen to be very quirky ) but the bills are stacking up and you are afraid you might have to go back to your job as an administrative assistant in the finance industry. You've just found out that your aunt back home in the Midwest (the only person in your family who is still alive) is sick with cancer. The stress and sadness are teari…

Well, maybe not yet

Time to put a Santa hat on that skeleton decoration.

The only bags she should pack are her own

Bonus points for imagination