Harry Potter

He's Soulless AND Weasel-y. I'm not convinced there's any right to be found in him, really. - Matty malaprop

Well, his closed-door policy on fairly relevant/important information always did make things difficult for Harry... - Matty Malaprop

Are you sure your friend is baking a cake? Or are the beaters here because she's whipping up a hearty breakfast featuring a big ol' stack of quaffles? #GROAN - Matty Malaprop

The internet grows and changes and evolves literally every second of every day... and yet somehow Harry Potter always remains king. - Matty Malaprop

Screw that one house with the badgers. And that one with the griffins. And especially that one with the snakes. This is clearly the best option. - Matty Malaprop

Strange, I don't recall his Patronus being a lion... - Matty Malaprop

... do you think he might perchance know a house-elf named Adobe? - Matty Malaprop

I'm serious; if you keep making terrible Potterpuns, I'm not going to hesitate in showing you the Dumbledore. - Matty Malaprop