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I love me a good Hobbit joke as much as the next person, but this conversation filled me with a bit of Mordorous intent. - Matty Malaprop

Social media at its best and worst on Failbook!

Maybe we should lay off him a bit, guys. No matter how much we pry, he's still telling us (empa)nada. - Matty Malaprop

And I'm sure the action sequences will go stale far too quickly. - Matty Malaprop

More punny Facebook updates over here!

I mean sure, she's got a bit of a frigid temperament, but what were you really expecting from a Neopolitan girl? - Matty Malaprop

My guess is that they were only trying to lend Christopher a helping hand, though something tells me he's perfectly capable of handling the situation himself. - Matty Malaprop

I was with you all until the Doritos joke... I mean, really, is there any potato-matter in a bag of Doritos at all? I'm skeptical. - Matty Malaprop

Just be warned, Blue. Marine Biology is a challenging field. I really hope for your sake that you have someone to go home and cuttle with at the end of the day. - Matty Malaprop

I'm thinking you find an annoying younger brother and shout "ER! ER! ER!" at him ad nauseam until he starts crying, but I could well be mistaken on this one. - Matty Malaprop

Sure, these are pretty clever, but they'll do you a fat latke of good when a bread-enthusiast turned door-to-door missionary comes knockin'. - Matty Malaprop

Social media at its best and worst on Failbook!

Facebook: Fighting off summer heat waves since Feb. 2004. - Matty Malaprop