bread

When it comes to getting your daily dose of grains, I can think of no better food to ingest than Methamphetawheat. - Matty Malaprop

Oh wait, white bread actually isn't very good for you at all... SORRY INWHITEBREAD HORSE WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO TAKE YOU OUT BACK AND SHOOT YOU IN THE LEG NOW :((((((((((((( - Matty Malaprop

It tastes stale and the size of each slice is so weasley. - Matty Malaprop

BAD JOKE EEL, WHY YOU NOT AS FUNNY AS YOUR MAMMALIAN COUNTERPART? - Matty Malaprop

So what falls in the realm of "medium-length bread" then? A nice focaccia? - Matty Malaprop

Sure, he's delicious, but that still doesn't account for his lack of soul. - Matty Malaprop

LOLOLOLOLOL and here you thought I was going to publish an actual computer geek joke LOLOLOLOLOL - Matty Malaprop

It's the all-new Loafmobile by Ryeundai! - Matty Malaprop

He's even cuter than his not-genetically-compromised counterparts! - Matty Malaprop