bread

It tastes stale and the size of each slice is so weasley. - Matty Malaprop

Just don't ask her how much she makes. She always gets a little rye about equality in the workplace. - Matty Malaprop

So what falls in the realm of "medium-length bread" then? A nice focaccia? - Matty Malaprop

In my family, it's tradition to always start breakfast with a lovely toast. - Matty Malaprop

Look on the bright side, Bruce! They may be gone, but at least they left you with a ton of dough! - Matty Malaprop

Oh wait, white bread actually isn't very good for you at all... SORRY INWHITEBREAD HORSE WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO TAKE YOU OUT BACK AND SHOOT YOU IN THE LEG NOW :((((((((((((( - Matty Malaprop

After all, we all know Jesus was betrayed by Judas because he really kneaded some dough. - Matty Malaprop

BAD JOKE EEL, WHY YOU NOT AS FUNNY AS YOUR MAMMALIAN COUNTERPART? - Matty Malaprop

He's even cuter than his not-genetically-compromised counterparts! - Matty Malaprop

When it comes to getting your daily dose of grains, I can think of no better food to ingest than Methamphetawheat. - Matty Malaprop