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... but why is there no hole in the road in the second picture? - Matty Malaprop

At least it's unmistakably an apple computer. - Matty Malaprop

TOTALLY TRUE FACT THAT'S TOTALLY NOT TRUE: Turtles have incredibly hairy undersides, and regular waxing is mandatory for all good turtle owners. - Matty Malaprop

All the convenience of a first-class flight, with nun of the hassle! - Matty Malaprop

OMG GENIUS IDEA OF THE DAY: POUTINE ON THE RITZ. BRB GOING TO MAKE FOOD HISTORY!!! - Matty Malaprop

Um... well... I mean... OH COME ON THAT'S JUST NOT FAIR YOU CAN'T MAKE LEMONADE WITH MILK! - Matty Malaprop

I'd congratulate your for you punmanship but I'm too busy giggling over the idea of Tingle condoms because I'm 12. - Matty Malaprop

And WHY is the rum gone? And for that matter, give me your keys, idiot. - Matty Malaprop

Put this one down on the list of "things I'm glad are really actually truly really real." - Matty Malaprop

Ordering one of these for lunch is guaranteed to put you on the sunny side of the afternoon! - Matty Malaprop

I get it I guess but why is there a kitten I don't even... - Matty Malaprop