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Hate to break it to you, Odysseus, but your epic journey is simply old hat in the Simpsons universe. - Matty Malaprop

TOTALLY TRUE FACT THAT'S TOTALLY NOT TRUE: Turtles have incredibly hairy undersides, and regular waxing is mandatory for all good turtle owners. - Matty Malaprop

I'd congratulate your for you punmanship but I'm too busy giggling over the idea of Tingle condoms because I'm 12. - Matty Malaprop

I'm far more partial to Low Tides. Their music is really quite enjoyable! - Matty Malaprop

It's not a lie if I vaguely but literally state exactly what the picture depicts, right? Right? - Matty Malaprop

... but maybe that's just me. I'm still trying to Seuss this one out, really. - Matty Malaprop

If that's the case, then I have doubts about how safe it is to drive such a vehicle... - Matty Malaprop

My mother always told me that a wet spreadsheet was no kind of spreadsheet at all. I never fully understood what she meant... - Matty Malaprop

Normally I hate drives that are always too eager to show off their ride's horns, but I can totally see why these two would be into that sort of thing! - Matty Malaprop

Put this one down on the list of "things I'm glad are really actually truly really real." - Matty Malaprop

Not to be picky... but isn't this haus closer to the curb than the middle of the street? I think the song a lot less catchy... #puncrusher - Matty Malaprop