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Make a list and never follow up on it. That's the way to procrastinate. Luckily you can just as easily procrastinate with a bunch of hilarious lists. Win-win.
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Company gets rid of incentive to work on holidays and weekends, act 'surprised and disappointed' when nobody signs up to work holidays: 'You only get as much loyalty as you're willing to pay for'
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Son leaves mother at airport with no ticket or plan after she refuses to leave his house and follow travel plans, ending 40-year pattern with silent goodbye: ‘She’s 70 now and has zero contact with 2 of her 3 kids’
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Wealthy son loans father money to keep his business, until son discovers father removed him from his will, leading son to sell the loans to dad's business competitor: ‘I saddled him with debt’
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Financially unstable sister demands sibling loan her money to help her start a business, sibling agrees only if they sign a contract, sister refuses: ‘I would never have done the same to you’
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Parents pressure teenage daughter go to expensive out-of-state school instead of her in-state choice, call her a 'spoiled brat' for accepting their help: 'I want to know I can stand on my own two feet'
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