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Make a list and never follow up on it. That's the way to procrastinate. Luckily you can just as easily procrastinate with a bunch of hilarious lists. Win-win.
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40+ of the Freshest and Funniest Tweets of the Week (November 27, 2025)
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Hiring manager calls night-shift worker in the middle of sleeping at 12pm: 'I know they’re going to show me the same job vacancy I didn’t accept before because of too low wage'
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Parents approaching retirement fund house 36-year-old daughter who never held a steady job, leaving her 29-year-old brother worried about inheriting the responsibility: ‘I have my own life’
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17-year-old refuses to babysit out-of-the-blue for her entitled aunt, mom defends her teen daughter: '[My Aunt doesn't get] to decide what I do with my time.'
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Sister destroys $200 worth of Christmas gifts for 18-month-old nephew, then claims it was to force more charity giving, getting herself cut off: ‘[She said] we “went overboard” on the amount and “needed to be grateful and give more to charity”’
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