Disgraceful

‘Tis the season! For you to hear the entire Santa Clause movie timeline explained in one convenient location by Jordan Breeding while he’s stuck in an extremely inconvenient battle for Santa's power. And yes, we mean the entire Santa Clause movie timeline: Every movie from The Santa Clause to The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause. Hopefully they don't make a Santa Clause 4.

The entire Resident Evil: Welcome To Raccoon City reboot movie timeline explained in one convenient location by Jordan Breeding stuck in one, extremely inconvenient marriage therapy session with his clone. Hopefully this reboot doesn't get a reboot sequel.

Ever see a movie that you think you could easily make…less bad? Hollywood makes a lot of bad movies, but "Doctor" Jordan Breeding is here to help fix some of the worst ones like Twilight , Batman V Superman , Indiana Jones: Crystal Skull , and every Pirates of the Caribbean after the first one. It really wouldn't be that hard.

An... interesting decision

As was the case for many older millennials , my cousin and I were intensely obsessed with The Matrix . We'd dress up and recite lines from the 1999 action film, writhing as we pretended to dodge bullets. We also learned that wearing sunglasses indoors can lead to injuries, but as tweens we didn't really care. We just wanted to pretend we were slick action heroes with a very important mission. While I can't speak for “kids these days,” it definitely seems like this specific brand of nerdiness ha…

Hasta la vista, baby.

Fly, you fools

It seems like certain heroes have been played by the same person…forever. Hugh Jackman practically is Logan to a generation of people. But what if the musical-loving Aussie wasn't available? Would Wolverine have been better portrayed Mario-era Bob Hoskins, Russell Crowe , or The Misfits' Danzig? Prrrrrobably not.

Hmm

Roger Ebert could never

It ain't pretty

Playing the same kind of character isn't relegated to “that guys” like Luis Guzman. Sometimes even the most famous actors like Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds get typecast. Not as just as hotties with naughty bodies, but as, like, creatures trying to evolve into new lifeforms and stuff. "Doctor" Jordan Breeding and Your Brain On Cracked return to diagnose these disturbing trends. Bonus? There's loads of Mads Mikkelsen in this vide.

Getting square eyes