From zero to subzero in six seconds. - Matty Malaprop
I feel like Philip Glass is one of the only neo-classical composers who gets any sort of consistent acclaim... but that's just bullocks in my mind; he's only even a semi-conductor! - Matty Malaprop
First he conquered plant puns, and now he's really living a life aquatic by the sound of things. - Matty Malaprop
If his ego is gigallontic already, I'd hate to see him full to the brim... - Matty Malaprop
Turns out it was there all along; we just needed to let Mercury ride its bicycle first in order to work up a sweat! - Matty Malaprop
Super Genius Man Tapes Mentos to His Body Then Jumps Into ...
A Random Text for Somebody Named Ash Turns Into an Opportunity ...
This is the Worst Elevator Ride These Guys Will Ever Have
Best of Tinder Week 2/22-2/27
Meet the McDonalds Employee Who Hates Fun
The Weightlifter's Struggle
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This Lady Gives the Ultimate How-To Guide To Dickpics
Thank Your Lucky Stars You Don't Have a Schedule Like This ...
These Guinea Pigs are Better Cosplayers Than You
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