Best Medical Report Ever

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Best Medical Report Ever
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I wonder how many nurses the hospital had to wrangle together in order to but this patient back out to pasture... - Matty Malaprop

Your Throat Must Be Foal of Phlegm...

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Your Throat Must Be Foal of Phlegm...
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Pygmyponyngitis is a silent but deadly disease -- one that ought be feared by all Dental Floss Tycoons the world over. - Matty Malaprop

Sea Horse

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Sea Horse
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Except, you know, this one doesn't spew sperm-esque babies from its abdomen, so I guess that makes it clearly superior? - Matty Malaprop

Horse Fly

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Horse Fly
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Well I've seen a dragonfly, and I've seen a housefly... (cue infectiously catchy song from Dumbo here...) - Matty Malaprop