Seems Like They're Really Getting to the Crust of the Matter

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Seems Like They're Really Getting to the Crust of the Matter
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After reading this groan-worthy pizza puns, I really feel like I could use a margherita. - Matty Malaprop

That's a Very Exact Amount, IMO

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That's a Very Exact Amount, IMO
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You know, a "whole lot" is just slightly less than a ton, but still considerably more than "a fair amount." MATHEMATICS! - Matty Malaprop

Just Like I Need This Cliché

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Just Like I Need This Cliché
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Whenever I receive a submission that features a joke as old as the interweb itself, I feel like the yeast I can do is front page it with some appropriately derisive and catty commentary. - Matty Malaprop

A Much-Kneaded Obituary

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A Much-Kneaded Obituary
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I'm not gonna lie... this touching farewell really got a rise out of me. - Matty Malaprop