Not So Much Demeaning As Merely Descriptive...

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bag,blonde,coffee,double meaning,flavor,literalism,pejorative,Starbucks
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Shame though. The man who found her tossed her out after he was done as though she was just so much trash. - Matty Malaprop

It'll Have You Doing Barrel Rolls!

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coffee,Hall of Fame,literalism,logo,similar sounding,Starbucks,starfox,video game
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Is your grasp on awakeness starting to get a little Slippy? A cup of our fresh-brewed java will have you Peppy in no time! - Matty Malaprop

Go Ahead, Fill'er Up!

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coffee,puns,sugar
Tags
By Unknown
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Mug shot

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beaned,bullet,bullet hole,coffee,grounds,mug,shot
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Owl Bee Seeing You

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i will,Owl,similar sounding,literalism,coffee,shape,shoop
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And hopefully sooner than later! The time I've spent with you has been a hoot! - Matty Malaprop

He Makes My Heart Flutter

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coffee,do want,double meaning,Hall of Fame,hot,innuendo,literalism
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... or maybe that's just the caffeine... - Matty Malaprop

Classic Newb Hipster Mistake!

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answer,before,burn,coffee,cool,double meaning,hipster,literalism,question,sip,tongue
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Every veteran hipster knows you don't drink your coffee until you've chain-smoked four cigarettes, duh! - Matty Malaprop