Classic Newb Hipster Mistake!

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answer,before,burn,coffee,cool,double meaning,hipster,literalism,question,sip,tongue
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Every veteran hipster knows you don't drink your coffee until you've chain-smoked four cigarettes, duh! - Matty Malaprop

He Was a Bit of a Health Nut

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adolf hitler,anxiety,auschwitz,caffeine,coffee,decaf,Hall of Fame,hitler,ill,similar sounding,switch
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Oh, did I say health nut? I meant nut. In general. As in totally batsh*t insane and awful. Sorry for the confusion. - Matty Malaprop

And Then My Hands Start to Slippy Off the Steering Column

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adjective,angry,character,coffee,double meaning,lolwut,name,nintendo,noun,peppy,starfox,Staring,video game
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... and I don't think anybunny wants me crashing my Arwing on today's mission, right? - Matty Malaprop

It'll Have You Doing Barrel Rolls!

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coffee,Hall of Fame,literalism,logo,similar sounding,Starbucks,starfox,video game
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Is your grasp on awakeness starting to get a little Slippy? A cup of our fresh-brewed java will have you Peppy in no time! - Matty Malaprop

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