Apologies for what must logically follow... #Obligatory - Matty Malaprop
Honey! HONEY! I have some great news for you! We're pregnant with a ruthless dictator! - Matty Malaprop
He's the pop star our nation deserves, but not the one it meeps right now. - Matty Malaprop
I bet you think I'm kidding, kid. But I'm totes m'goats fr rlz about this. - Matty Malaprop
You'd be cursing too if you were held aleft by some unseen force, I bet. - Matty Malaprop
Oh, "Scrubs..." why your network hasn't wiped you from existence yet is utterly beyond me. - Matty Malaprop
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