edward

WRONG this is a puppet / this is a disco ball

AND LOOKS WAY BETTER than Robert Pattinson

VAMPIRES remember when they sucked blood and not d*ck

UPDATED but no less true

NYANPIRE still scarier than edward

INADEQUACY when a puppet makes a better vampire than you could ever be.

SUPER MEGA EPIC FAIL if you know it's in the book, that means you read it too? Simple logic.

SPOKEN like a true hufflepuff

IN THAT POSITION all we need is a guillotine

LIKE A BOSS!

IF SHE PREFERS this is over Edward, she's a keeper

ED WOOD still more romantic than Twilight

THIS counts does not.

THIS IS A VAMPIRE this is not