It's challenging to summarize the sheer number of wild things Elon Musk has proposed as the new unwanted overlord of Twitter. He laid off an excessive number of Twitter employees seemingly without understanding the consequences of doing so. He will allow people to buy verification for $8 a month. He has permanently suspended comedians with no warning for mocking this new initiative by impersonating him. He has begun unblocking his personal account from people who have blocked him. He has even p…

Most casinos are chaotic and depressing places . The free booze, cool temperatures, and desperation combine to create a place that can inspire excitement, but more often misery and disappointment. My times at casinos have started with optimism, the truth is that I have no freaking idea what I'm doing, and I usually walk away with the most minor of gains or break even. It's underwhelming and sometimes unsettling. But it's always the atmosphere that leaves me the most spooked. TikToker @nlwestfal…

Picture this: You're a woman in the big city who is working hard to build your cookie company. You have a few clients (most of whom you've known a long time, and happen to be very quirky ) but the bills are stacking up and you are afraid you might have to go back to your job as an administrative assistant in the finance industry. You've just found out that your aunt back home in the Midwest (the only person in your family who is still alive) is sick with cancer. The stress and sadness are teari…

“Don't you get it? If you die in the game, you die for real.”

They don't want 'em

Dungeons and Dragons is one of those games I have never gotten the opportunity to play. I feel like the social space of the D&D group can be kind of exclusive and definitely more of a commitment than your average board game night. When people say that Monopoly takes up too much time, I'm sure D&D players laugh in their faces. Imagine having to develop your characters in Monopoly and keep coming back to continue playing with the same Monopoly group on different financial quests . Despite this ig…

Twitter has been on a lot of people's minds these days. And that's saying something because it's always on our minds. But that's probably because we have been completely poisoned by the world wide web. ANYWAY. The reason that people are talking about Twitter is none other than Elon Musk , who has been stirring up all kinds of controversy since taking over Ye Olde Birde App. The site has been turned upside down between the mass firings and rumors about changes the billionaire is planning on maki…

Musical parody genius Weird Al Yankovic has never been shy about his opinion on pirating media. His track “Don't Download This Song,” which is a parody of "We Are the World' style charity songs took pretty pointed aim at the legal battles surrounding music downloading sites such as Napster, and the stars (mainly Lars Ulrich) who took the side of record companies in absurd cases against seven-year-old children and dead grandmothers. As a ‘90s kid who used Napster in class, and was well aware of…

There is a spectrum of pettiness that we are all on, but some people go so above and beyond. Some special petty divas allow the pettiness they had in life to come through beyond the grave. Often this is communicated in the form of wills or inheritances. Who could forget a certain news anchor whose mother only left him $1 in her will? One might think there isn't an act of post-mortem pettiness greater than that, but they would be gravely mistaken.

It's that time of the year again: The World Series. On some level, every baseball fan is excited about the world series, but everyone knows that not all world series' are created equal. In my household, nothing compared to watching the Chicago Cubs break the curse in 2016. Even though I might not be the biggest baseball fan in the world, seeing how much that win meant to my family and the city of Chicago was so powerful to watch. This year, we've got the Phillies vs. the Astros. I have never li…

Everybody's got something they're good at. While some find their passions early with childhood artistic or athletic endeavors, others have talents that aren't fully appreciated until later in life. I'm talking, of course, about being a hater. School bullying is a crude and amateur form of the art and science of hating. Haters can take on many career paths: stand-up comedians, hedge fund managers, Presidents, and social media managers. There is no arena where haters thrive more than social media…

As a thirty-something "young" professional, I've been to a lot of weddings lately. And they've been absolutely lovely. Many of the couples wrote their own vows, some in English, some in Spanish, and some of the vows were sweetly translated into both. What if, instead of creative vows, or the classic ‘til death do us part,’ the couple said the following: “For as long as this feels healthy, safe, and meaningful for both of us.” Well, it would be weird. And you'd wonder why you were signing a chec…

Plus: what's up with East 81st Street Deli?

Being a parent during the days following Halloween is an insane exercise in self-control. A bag or multiple bags of assorted candy is sitting dormant in your house at this very second. Surely, nobody would notice if you took one fun-sized Snickers bar , right? There's no way stealing some Dots would make you one of the worst parents in the world pertaining to the aftermath of Halloween. Parents out there make their kids give away all of their candy to the local dentist's office! There are paren…

Twitter has a new main character this week, complete with a wild and unexpected backstory. I've found that most of the “Twiter Main Characters” tend to be parents who make mind-numbing decisions regarding raising their family. One of the most infamous of these characters is the Bean Dad, who sat idly by and watched his young daughter struggle to open a can of beans with a can opening for hours without helping her. Earlier this year, a parent described supporting their adopted kid's emotional ne…

There is a lot