Parents love to document every milestone their kid reaches. A child's first steps, first word, and the first day of school are all recorded carefully by their mom and dad so they can relive that memory for years to come. However, the most memorable moments of a kid's life usually happen when the cameras aren't around. When I was a kid, I somehow got my parents to give myself and my sister the s*x talk by asking endless questions about the biology of conjoined twins. There might not be a scrapbo…

Just another reason I'm a cat person.

Where is this mysterious lady magic bean?? Reveal your secrets!

Dystopian

When you're in high school, you have very little freedom. One of the few choices you can make for yourself is which trapper keeper you get from Staples. This is a critical decision, as that multiuse binder won't break for at least three years, so you better make the right choice. The question of “which binder color should I choose for which subject” was never one that phased me. I simply picked the binders with the prettiest colors and chose which subjects they were for based on ambiguous vibes…

So much regret.

So much autotune

At least we can laugh at them.

Peak entitlement

The teacher shortage in the United States has caused significant problems in public schools. Many states are lowering the requirements for teaching to ridiculous levels just to ensure they have enough educators to go around. During the pandemic, the school system and parents put an astronomical amount of pressure on teachers to do impossible tasks. For the 2020-2021 school year and since then, more and more teachers have taken a stand and left the profession for good. While this has benefitted…

Jennette McCurdy's memoir “I'm Glad My Mom Died” came out this Tuesday to much hype and fanfare. The book has been received with

Kids today would never understand

Don't tell Italy

We all love puns , right? No, No, we don't. Puns can often be the fodder of dull people who desperately want others to think they're clever. I don't want to sit around all day and listen to half-jokes from someone who would rather be witty than be funny. My perfect pun does not make any sense on the most fundamental level. I want a pun that makes people question the art and science of wordplay . Luckily, the latest Twitter meme fits perfectly into my philosophy of pun-making. The viral “Shocked…

Crazy stage mothers forcing their child into the acting industry is a tale as old as time. From Jackie Coogan to Drew Barrymore and beyond, it's never not devastating to watch a parent take advantage of their children's talent, take all of their money, and let the industry chew them up and spit them out. Unfortunately, this cycle repeated itself with former iCarly and Sam and Cat star Jennette McCurdy. Luckily, McCurdy has come out on the other side of the abuse, but she does not plan on doing…

Everyone finds their little way to rebel as a teenager. There was one point in 6th grade where my eyeliner was so black, thick, and around every crevice of my eyeball that it looked like I was about to put on a raccoon Halloween costume at any moment. Being a rebel becomes a less attainable identity when you're a fully grown adult. Things that were once deemed unacceptable and strange by your parents become much more normal. Like what, you're in your twenties and regularly frequent your local D…