Love is a battlefield

For those who strut their stuff solo

There are some jobs you can't help but call out from sometimes. Sure, sometimes you're actually sick, but you know as well as I do that you're not always telling the gospel truth when calling in with a story about a mystery illness. In college, I was addicted to calling off from my security guard job. Granted, I had a genuinely unsustainable schedule of classes, extracurriculars, and work that made showing up to my 7 AM shift every Monday difficult. Not only that, but I had to work 8 hours that…

Parenting is a lot of things, but it isn't glamorous. One minute you're a freedom-enjoying adult, the next you've popped out some kind of hellion and your life has changed forever. While some of those changes are good, there are others that are a bit of a bummer in retrospect. Being able to use the bathroom alone becomes a rare and relished occurrence. Frequent diaper changing makes existence more poopy than you could ever imagine, and somehow it feels like you're constantly cleaning up messes.…

The discourse around the ethics of ghosting has been floating around the internet for years, and it seems like everybody feels strongly about it. I am convinced that some people believe that ghosting is a war crime. I am pro-ghosting in certain circumstances, and I'm no stranger to ghosting people after a first date, especially when nobody mentions wanting a second date during the initial date. My villain origin story for why I don't hate ghosting is one for the books. I went on a date when I w…

Most posts are a dime a dozen. You see hundreds of posts every day, but few have much staying power within your consciousness. However, there are those rare post that through being shared over and over again, have attained a legendary status. These posts vary from unknowingly hilarious tweets made by nobodies to utterly insane insults crafted by the most creative minds. So many people want to create a hit post, but very few of us have skills to do so intentionally. Most of the time, the best po…

Absolutely tragic

Say what

Some big asks

What on earth

Express yourself

They're trying.

That's enough now

Another memory to bring up in therapy

Supremely awkward.

“Don’t get married… or move your coffee machine”