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Instances Of Absentminded Stupidity From Embarrassed People

Someone on /r/AskReddit asked people to tell their most embarrassing instances of stupidity and absent-mindedness, and boy did the people deliver. Lucky for you, we've gathered some of those stories below! Check out Fail Blog for tons more fails!

Funny stories from /r/AskReddit of people who did embarrassing things | MissyDeanna 2y 34 years old and my Dad still tells following story doing dumb thing anyone willing listen 8 years old got pack Big League Chew gum hanging out garage with my Dad he saw about open gum he said Now whatever do, do not put this eye said ok won't then walked into house, went upstairs into my bathroom, chewed on ton gum, took out my mouth and put on my eye gum perfect texture sticky and stuck my eyebrow and all my
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Seventeen Cringey Times People Witnessed Next-Level Dumbassery

There's such a thing as blissful ignorance, but we're pretty sure these people aren't it. We do feel sort of bad for them, but at the same time, they provide us with a lot of entertainment, and they kind of make us feel better about our own intellect...

Funny AskReddit post asking people moments they heard people saying stupid things | Suzanne_Marie 11335 points 4 hours ago locked my purse with my keys and cell phone my apartment went office ask maintenance let woman at desk said she would call maintenance and asked phone number they could reach at said there wasn't one because my cell phone locked my apartment. She insisted she needed number said could give her number but wouldn't be able answer if they called. She suggested get my phone out
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Redditors Share Their Unsettling 'Glitch In The Matrix' Moments

It may not be Halloween, but that doesn't mean we can't get our fix of spooky stories in the off-season. Scary stories are one of those things that most people enjoy hearing, but not experiencing themselves. They may give you nightmares but at the end of the day, that adrenaline rush is totally worth it. Now onto the creepy stories! And check out even more on eBaum's World!

Creepy stories on Reddit that people couldn't explain | posted by KitKeating 1985. My ex wife and were sleeping. There small sliver light coming through window streetlight, so room and bed were dimly visible. Our black Pomeranian at end bed asleep dreamt woke up, reached down pet him, and he turned into glossy black bivalve/oyster thing which opened up reveal rows gleaming glass teeth woke up my ex backpedalling up
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Roundup Of Completely True Stories That Sound Made-Up

Some stories that exist out there sound like they're straight out of a movie. They can't possibly be true, right? Not so - writer Aidan Moher tweeted out the other day asking people to share their most unbelievable true stories, and let us just say...the people delivered.

Interesting Twitter thread of stories that sound fake but are actually true | tweet by MorganPielli Replying adribbleofink went Meetup people w/ social anxiety see Black Swan got there realized had no idea who there Meetup. Too shy ask around watched movie alone checked Meetup night turned out everyone else did same thing
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Amused Butcher Shares His Most Frustrating Customer Stories

If you think your job sucks, then just take a gander through the following posts written by an amused and frustrated butcher who has, let's just say, seen it all when it comes to terrible customers. The stupidity here is truly amazing, people.

Be sure to check out the Butcher Stories official Facebook page for even more woeful tales of staggering stupidity!

Funny stories of a frustrated butcher's experiences with entitled customers | facebook post BS Butcher Stories lost everything during storm. Customer guys really should have better plan place. Like having someone work during storm logic is if someone got hurt during storm would be worse than losing some product Customer Eye roll guess
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Nineteen Clever And Creepy Stories Told In Just Two Sentences

It may not be October, but we're always down for some creepy content. That's why we were pretty stoked to learn about the subreddit /r/TwoSentenceHorror where people tell their spookiest stories in, yes, just two sentences. It lends itself to some unexpected creativity that we think you're gonna like. 

Want more creepy stories? Head on over to Fail Blog!

Creepy stories from the subreddit /r/TwoSentenceHorror | r/TwoSentenceHorror Posted by u/TitusPotPie 4mo My four year old said he wished people didn't have knock told him about doorbells, and he asked install one on his window. 14,3k 128 Share
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Tumblr Thread About Playing D&D Will Hit You Right In The Feels

We don't usually expect to get all teary-eyed from a Tumblr writing prompt, but we definitely appreciate surprises. This particular prompt imagines a situation in which Death decides to offer a game in exchange for our protagonist's life. Dungeons and Dragons, a game that can be endless, is quickly chosen. We follow their years-long journey and by the end the sappiness is supreme. 

Tumblr thread about Death and D&D | writing-prompt-s Death offers game life decide on D&D studioprey assume never played asked cloaked figure across shook their head slowly Great said Ill be DM walk through everything. First, character creation Six hours later Death sat leaned over table with mountain dew one hand and D20 other. Their hood thrown back reveal bleached grinning skull were company four infernals depths Abyss don't remember which us invited each them. Turned out had quite few friend
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Guy Gets Trapped In An Elevator, Turns Into Hilarious 'Cast Away' Situation

Getting trapped in an elevator is a worst fear for a lot of people. This guy lived to tell the tale in Snapchat form when he got stuck in an elevator at work. Not going to lie, we're a little disappointed that he didn't resort to pulling a Bear-Grylls-drinking-his-own-pee scenario, but we can't have everything we want in life.

In case you're in the mood for even more Snapchat hilarity, we got you covered.


Funny Snapchat story about a guy who gets stuck in an elevator and jokingly makes it into a "Castway" scenario | Day 1, Minute 50 have fashioned this headdress out my scrubs battle sweltering burns fluorescent lights selfie of a man in a head wrap
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Fascinating Thread Explains The Different Kinds Of Inner Monologues People Have

Well this is a fascinating tidbit that we'd certainly never considered before; people have different types of inner monologues, according to this shocked Imgur user. Some people hear full-on sentences and words, while others have more fragmented or abstract thoughts. Which camp are you in? 

If you're a total psychology geek and want to read about some interesting psych experiments, check out Fail Blog!

Interesting Imgur thread and tweets about how people have different kinds of internal monologues | do read without saying words brain. Be descriptive please can say them my head, like can read myself silently obviously but reading there are key words each sentence can see and 's can retain can straight up look at myself mirror and have full blown telepathic conversation with myself. Can not do Nooo0o If need have convo with myself mirror have out loud can't do my head Okay good night. Life is no
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Twitter Users Describe The Dumbest Family Fights They've Been In

Families are almost always dysfunctional as is, and when you spend enough time around the same people, emotions can run haywire. Jimmy Fallon asked Twitter about the most moronic fights they've ever been in with their families, and they did not disappoint. If you're a weird one and you feel like you need even more family-related content, click here for some memes!

Funny Twitter thread started by Jimmy Fallon asking readers about the dumbest family fight they've ever been in | tweet by magicdel My dad discovered hadn't returned book library. This escalated into huge argument as he convinced would affect his credit score because my library card still registered at his address.#DumbestFamilyFight
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Fourteen People Share Their Most Mortifying Moments

Embarrassing moments happen to literally everyone, some more than others. These people just happened to get caught in some extra embarrassing situations bad enough to make anyone cringe. We just pray that they were able to overcome the trauma eventually.

Funny tweets about embarrassing moments | tweet by OFLaCar Meant say "hold on second" and give minute customer and came out as hold me second monday
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16 Scared Redditors Reveal The Creepiest Things Kids Have Ever Said Them

Just in time for Halloween, we're bringing you some Reddit stories about freaky things kids have said. We can't guarantee that these stories are all true, but they're creepy as hell either way!

Spooky Reddit stories about creepy things kids have said to them
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Dumb Accidents Unlucky People Have Gotten Themselves Into

Sometimes smart people do very stupid things, and that's okay because we can't all be geniuses in our off time. Everyone's injured themselves in moronic ways, such as sneezing and hitting your head against the sink and ending up with a baseball-sized goose egg on your forehead. True story, sadly.

Funny tweets where people detail the dumbest ways they've been injured
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Bitcoin 'Expert' Tries To Scam An Amused Accountant On Instagram

We'd like to give these scammers the benefit of the doubt and assume that they don't know they're involved in a scam. Either that or someone who's down on their luck might resort to desperate measures to earn a bit of extra cash. Either way, this dude definitely picked the wrong person to mess with!

Funny Instagram message thread from a scammer
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Guy Live-Tweets His Stepson Trying To Sneak A Girl Out Of His Room

We all have embarrassing teenage stories that range from "oof" to "YIKES," but this kid might take the cake for having the most embarrassing story of all. It all started with a tweet from his step dad, who wanted to give the world a hysterical play-by-play. Scroll down to see what happens!

twitter funny tweets stories twitter story hooking up kids teenagers hookup parents sneaking out - 7594757
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