Mixed assumptions

These are wild

He just described my summer plans

“I'm a comedian.” Three words, beginning with a contraction, that make me back away in revulsion. Back when I had Tinder, I listed two kinds of people who I simply would not converse with: The above self-proclaimed funnymen, and burners. Burners, as in Burning Man attendees. These types of people and their personalities (for the most part) couldn't turn me on less. My other major sexual dealbreaker is skipping foreplay, which is harder to assess when swiping on a dating profile . Most people ca…

tfw your servant malfunctions

Just stay single

Examples of guys being dudes

Love is a battlefield

Defend valley girls

A+ for audacity

Being single never felt better

Be unemployed if you want

He's gotta smell

These can be suspicious

Come again?

So gross