“I'm a comedian.” Three words, beginning with a contraction, that make me back away in revulsion. Back when I had Tinder, I listed two kinds of people who I simply would not converse with: The above self-proclaimed funnymen, and burners. Burners, as in Burning Man attendees. These types of people and their personalities (for the most part) couldn't turn me on less. My other major sexual dealbreaker is skipping foreplay, which is harder to assess when swiping on a dating profile . Most people ca…

We see it in private DMs. We see it in comment sections. We see it on dating profiles. Softbois , “ nice guys ,” and straight up dirtbags who are pathetically down bad. It seems like some dudes are so depressingly horny, that they become possessed by some sort of cringe demon. How else do you explain the mortifying word garbage these softbois are capable of assaulting other human beings with? We've got a bunch of painful examples of what we're talking about from the best archivist of softboi cr…

Gross.

Even in 2022, some people still have pretty medieval views on gender roles, like one redditor's girlfriend and her parents who believe that every man should be able to fix things around the house. Do they also believe their daughter should quit her good job and do all the housework and cooking? I don't really want to know the answer to that. When u/housework1998 vented to r/amitheasshole about his situation, redditors were overwhelmingly on OP's side.

What is a softboi ? If you've ever received a flirty unsolicited message from someone who speaks in platitudes, drops backhanded compliments that simultaneously flatter and insult, or talks at length about how "different" they are, then you likely already know. Thanks to @beam_me_up_softboi 's archive of weird DMs from pick-up artists, sapiosexuals, and self-proclaimed ' nice guys ,' we've amassed a very cringe compilation of receipts that prove how low softbois can go.

Nothing is off limits

Stop telling the world our secrets!

Just admit you’re 5’11 bro

Damn, Twitter

Men address everything from anatomy to relationships

Not all heroes wear capes. Some wear helmets, others stethoscopes. But some kind-hearted heroes work behind a bar, wielding rags and working for tips. We all know that bartenders have hard jobs. Wrangling drunks and scrambling for tiny tips isn't easy. But we don't often talk about the way bartenders look out for their clientele, whether they're offering an ear to a troubled person, or protecting women from creepy patrons. Twitter user @guttersnipe tweeted about the latter situation this week,…

There's no light at the end of this one

Because girls have cooties.

*Smiles and nods*

Major ick all round

How??