No nerd's heart is safe...

It never ceases to astound me how much Harry Potter fanfiction there is in this world. Former Harry Potter fanfiction authors are now New York Times Bestsellers, whether you like it or not. An entire generation's passion for creative writing began with Drarry and Dramione stories featuring plots I couldn't speak of in a public setting. I wouldn't be surprised if Harry Potter is the most written-about fandom in the entire history of fanfiction. I did not particularly obsess over Potter fanfictio…

Today marks three years since March 13th, 2020 , and we all know what that means. It has been three years since it all began. I remember I was in Missouri at my best friend's house, eating KFC and watching Unfriended . The guy who delivered the KFC said this was his first delivery. It was the beginning of one memorable year. Why did I mention this traumatic and terrifying time during a Harry Potter meme list , you may ask? If it weren't for March 13th and the events that followed it, I probably…

One of my favorite parts of the Harry Potter books were the Quidditch matches. There's something so relatable and simple about the fact that on that Quidditch pitch, Harry was just a normal kid. Sure, he was a jock and a sports prodigy, being the first first year to join the Quidditch team, but it was uniquely special watching him thrive in something. Harry wasn't a star student like Hermione and didn't have a great wizard family life like Ron. Quidditch is one of those things that he could suc…

I have never been a big fan of the Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them series. I'm happy that more movies are being made about the wizarding world, but I wish that these were different movies. JK Rowling is clearly surrounded by yes men who let her write the screenplay for all of these movies, despite her not having any skills as a screenwriter. Her author brain wanted to insert ten million characters into Fantastic Beasts that nobody cared about. She wanted to flesh out all of their backst…

Thank you, Chamber of Secrets.

“What are you reading right now?” is one of the scariest questions an intellectual hot person can ask you. It's a question more loaded than a baked potato because there is a correct and incorrect answer to it.

If you ask a random Harry Potter fan off the street what they think of Severus Snape , chances are you will get a strong opinion. Get 100 Potterheads in a room, and there's a chance none of them will share the exact same take on Snape. Over the years, fan opinions have slowly but surely turned against Snape. While some still view him as a hero, it's a lot more common for people to see him as no more than a common villain who was needlessly cruel to an abused child because he still has a crush o…

Mostly politics-free

I'm sure everybody, no matter what Hogwarts house they're in, wishes they could spend their hours of study and leisure in the Gryffindor Common Room . None of the other common rooms could compare to where Harry, Ron, and Hermione spend their Hogwarts days inbetween classes. The Slytherin Common room would make you feel like you're surrounded by concrete, with the AC always turned up way too high. There's probably a lot of fluorescent lighting that would do a number on the complexion. Look at ho…

You can't press play without playing AVADA KEDAVRA!

Do any minorities in the wizarding world have normal names?

If there's one Harry Potter character whose hype I never really understood, it's Draco Malfoy . So many Draco fangirls see him as a misunderstood boy with secret depth and hidden pain. I don't think that the text of the books or the movies really supports that, but I believe they get this idea from the aesthetics of Harry Potter itself. Draco is in the dark Hogwarts house. He lives in the dark dungeons of the school and doesn't really have any other friends besides his lackeys. He is raised in…

To say that we are not fans of JK Rowling would be an understatement, but even if she stopped being a TERF, there's plenty to admonish her for. Today, we learned of another reason. While people have been discussing the subject of JK Rowling's sorta kinda racist map of the Wizarding schools for some time, the controversy (and later, hilarity) came to our attention via the @TerribleMaps Twitter account. The @TerribleMaps post features a fan's geographic depiction of Rowling's schools (the origina…

One of the greatest mysteries of my life has been one I'm sure all of us have asked at one point or another; What does Butterbeer taste like? That unanswered query is why I recently marched down to the Harry Potter store right near the Flatiron Building and spent 12 whole American dollars on a foamy glass of Harry Potter's favorite beverage. Nobody had ever described what it tasted like to me, so I was excited and ready for anything. When I tell you it is simply a butterscotch-flavored crème so…

[SPOILER ALERT] Not to turn the series into a love story, but would've been nice to really dive into how Harry and Ginny fall in love. It was just like immature flirting and then BOOM it's the end and they're married??