The antics of "Florida Man" have become such a thing that we're constantly surprised to find out a crazy news story happened somewhere else. Here are some of "his" antics - they're sure to make you feel like a functioning member of society.
florida
Florida hip-hop artist XXXTentacion was shot dead Monday in what officials believe to have been an armed robbery. Reception to his death has been mixed - with many artists coming out on Twitter to lament his wasted potential. The death was also met with as much controversy as he received during his life.
XXXTentacion, born Jahseh Dwayne Onfroy, spent much of his career in jail for various felonies, and most upsettingly - severely assaulting his pregnant girlfriend. Memers do not take kindly to injustices such as this. While redditors generally avoid meme-ing the dead, XXXTentacion's sinister side makes memers feel this is an exception. And the memes are kinda brutal. Even more unsettling? The bizarre conspiracy theories that Jahseh is still alive. It seems fans have been spreading an old clip of the artist claiming he is still alive, and it has caused a great amount of confusion.
Via @WaffleHouse
THIS IS NOT A DRILL! Several Waffle Houses in Florida are closing due to Hurricane Matthew. Even FEMA knows that's a bad thing. They have an informal "Waffle House Index". When these diners start closing they know they have a disaster on their hands and raise that index to "red".
Even people not involved with a national disaster agency know this means things are serious:
via @kalebhorton, @hintofspy, @WhoDatTN, @SarahDecedue
Apparently, the person behind Obvious Plant took a little vacation recently because he dropped off this fake guest book at a Florida AirBnB. These people's reasons for visiting Florida will inspire you to hop on a plane right now to spend some time in the sunshine state. Or, maybe you'll want to stay far, far away from there. Either way, these testimonials are worth the read.
Via stephen bender
Just spare yourself the embarrassment of walking out empty handed and with your tail between your legs.
