Feed me!

Breezy

Having a sense of humor is an invaluable quality. You don't have to be a brilliant standup comedian to know that! Comedy is highly beneficial if you're weak in other social skills. How many times have you heard the story of the class clown who was able to gain the respect of their fellow students through their sense of humor? I was 100% that kid when I was in high school. I took this John Waters quote extremely literally when I was a teen, and in some ways, I still do! "Anytime you make someone…

I was a bit of a whiner as a kid. I am outing myself. That said, my mother wasn't the most engaging parent. She sat at the same chair every day, chainsmoking and drinking Lipton tea while filling out her logic problem books that she bought at the stationery store. While I was a very imaginative (morbid, even) child, there were times when not even my own brain could keep me entertained. And it wasn't like I could turn on the TV. That wasn't allowed. So I'd whine to my mother that I was bored. “I…

No waiting around

They're free!

We live in a time where it seems like convenience is at the forefront of literally everything. Instead of taking a leisurely stroll to the farmer's market and taking in the sights and sounds of the neighborhood, people opt to use apps that will have another person do your shopping for you. Eating locally (and prohibitively expensively) never tasted so easy. Instead of spending your hard earned cash at local boutiques, book stores, and thrift shops when you need a gift for someone special - or s…

There are too many

Happy hump day, everyone. It is Wednesday, my dudes. And guess what? We're not feeling great about this particular day of the week, no matter how hard Camel Joe and the cigarette companies tried to make Wednesday a good thing. But when life hands you lemons, and it's too cold for lemonade, sometimes you have to make the best of things in another less proverbial way. We need to take pleasure from wherever we can get it, and the man isn't gonna do that job for us. Sometimes we have to stake out o…

Woah!!!

What up, my dudes? On a day like today, when it's absolutely freezing outside, what's better than getting cozy with some memes? If you're stuck inside because it's snowing, sleeting, and just generally unpleasant, memes can be the perfect pick-me-up to keep your spirits warm. There's something about scrolling through a never-ending stream of hilarious memes that just makes me forget about the repulsive weather outside. Whether it's cats doing stupid stuff or ridiculous memes about the latest po…

I wish I could be one of those people who could raw dog vision. By that, I mean the second you open your eyes, you can see the world without assistance from glasses or contacts . If you're a diva of the 20/20 vision experience, consider me officially jealous of you. I've worn contacts for 10 years now, and sometimes I have the creeping inner thought that I should just go and get my eyes zapped. The fact that there are lasers that can easily make your vision good in one foul swoop is so insanely…

Strap in

Pure guesswork

A little extra

Another day, another dollar. Why does it always feel like such a struggle? First of all, you have to wake up, and if that wasn't already harrowing enough, then you have to get out of bed. Once you've made it that far, it's time for those daily hygienic rituals that help others perceive you to be a functioning member of society. I don't know about you, but I'm not Patrick Bateman when it comes to my morning routine. I'm dragging my feet and using the drugstore brand lotion. Exercise ? Fat chance…