Beers in the shower just hit different

Take 'em

Curating a group of memes is similar to making a big meal: they're hard to enjoy if there's only one thing. Imagine flying out to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving dinner. You walk into her home, greet your extended family, sit down for a gorgeous holiday meal, and discover that the only thing on the table is cornbread casserole . That's it. Everyone has to eat a whole dinner plate full of nothing but cornbread casserole and pretend they enjoy it. The first 10 bites are good, but once y…

Who needs apples

While the things that lead up to trends and historical events seem obvious in retrospect, predicting things that haven't happened yet is much more challenging than it might seem. People shouldn't be so arrogant when they make overconfident and often pessimistic forecasts about the future, because no one can foretell the exact course of events. When you are correct, you may appear to be a big shot, but tweet something that ages like milk and you may end up on a list just like this. We've gathere…

Hi mom and dad!

Did you guys see the flaming bagpipe Darth Vader unicycle man cross the Willamette today?

Is it just me, or has it been a long time since there's been a national holiday ? Martin Luther King Jr. Day was four months ago, and that's far too long to go without a long weekend. Long weekends give us the opportunity to unwind a little bit more than we would on a regular weekend. You might not be able to have a full-tilt vacation, but boy howdy, can you have a lovely staycation in those three little days! This weekend I'm going to be both fun and productive. I'm going to get my hair done,…

Help! I'm being spontaneous!

Main course: procrastination

Oh yeah, baby. It 's Friday, y'all. But does the coming of Friday really mean all that much? As I get older, the arrival of Friday seems to bring less and less satisfaction. It's true that I can go out and party until 6 am without much work-related consequence (like, I won't get fired), but with age comes brutal hangovers, extra dehydration, and the dreaded brain fog that makes even simply existing a trial all its own. Moaning and groaning my way through Saturday and Sunday sounds like hell - a…

Roll for memes

Diets suck. I should know - I recently embarked on a weight loss journey with the help of a little thing called ‘Weight Watchers.’ Now that every food is ascribed points and I'm left to add up the

Yummy

What up, weed enthusiasts! It hasn't been too long since New York City has officially legalized marijuana, but the signs are literally everywhere. Dispensaries, legal or not, seem to be on every street. The air reeks of weed smoke, which probably pisses some people off. As a true blue native New Yorker who's been blazing since high school, I couldn't be happier to get a whiff on my way to work. To honor the new normal, I've put together a very 420-related collection of memes. From hilarious enc…

Again