stairs
Take the stairs, not the elevator. Great for your health, and for a makeshift workout when you're stuck at home, just make sure to take them one at a time, you wouldn't want to trip over some of these multi-leveled puns.
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65-year-old mom allows son and daughter-in-law to move in, considers selling after he berates her for having friends visit his 4350 sq ft 'forever home': 'I spent $15,000 fixing the house and moved to the granny flat'
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Man named Daniel Rivera uses a fake name to apply for jobs, immediately starts getting interviews: 'Now considering doing all future applications as Brandon Walker'
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Houseguests learn host took day off to relax after their stay, so they extend trip only to get kicked out 11 hours before flight: 'The day off is for me to rest, not to be their host'
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Employee leaves his 7 and 10-year-old kids at warehouse, expecting contractor to babysit them without asking him to do so: 'I immediately call him and tell him to take them with you or I call DCFS'
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40+ of the Freshest and Funniest Tweets of the Week (April 19, 2025)
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