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A nice robust paycheck never fails to unrustle my jimmies. - Matty Malaprop

Music may be a somewhat efemural thing, but the instruments it's made on are forever. - Matty Malaprop

... but just because you can finally play locally doesn't mean you should stop writing angry Screwtape Letters to your Narnian ISPs! - Matty Malaprop

I imagine this particular artist did not score very high trademarks in his circle-drawing seminar... - Matty Malaprop

Better than that crazy crooner from Sweden though. Talk about a real loon! - Matty Malaprop

When I find myself in times of fatness, Mother Wii Fit comes to me... - Matty Malaprop

Their cuisine is so good, it'll have you saying "oh my pho ga!" - Matty Malaprop

Check out more funny Facebookery over here!

I hear you can kill McFlies with a taser so long as you make sure to jolt them with at least 1.21 gigawatts of power. - Matty Malaprop

... because every time I see you my Jokulhaups* to attention! - Matty Malaprop

Source: Three Word Phrase

• Yes, my p33n is named Jokul. WHATCHAGONNADOABOUTIT?

Oh, those terrorists and their turbane opinions... - Matty Malaprop

And for that matter, what about cantankeroustrees? Tenacioustrees? Do you just hate all things arboreal, or just pleasant ones in particular? - Matty Malaprop

Kratoast is a filling, easy-to-make breakfast, and it goes GREAT with a big glass of orange Zeus! - Matty Malaprop

The whole affair turned especially awkward when he found out the nuns were more than a little repulsed by his cat hole licking fetish. - Matty Malaprop

Do you want more feline funny? We haz dat for you here!

Given the age of Facebook at this point, I wouldn't exactly call Zuckerberg an entrepreneur. Maybe an entrepremiddleaged? - Matty Malaprop