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Is he... is he shooped with Hillary Clinton here? - Matty Malaprop

"Rocky Raccoon" was originally going to be a semi-biographical song about their friend Oliver Owl, but their label made them change it for copyright reasons. - Matty Malaprop

See what I did there? I made a joke making fun of Americans for being dumb and not reading. Aren't I just so clever????? - Matty Malaprop

I've been watching this for like five minutes now, and it's really starting to gif me a headache. - Matty Malaprop

I'm very sympathetic to the owner of the cup in this post. If my favorite coffee cup ever breaks, it will feel like I've lost an extremi-tea. - Matty Malaprop

Nothing to sort here, hat. Move along. - Matty Malaprop

See? It's funny because strawberries produce runners and that is also a term that can be applied to people who flee police pursuit LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL #OkayThat'sNotReallyVeryFunnyAtAll - Matty Malaprop

It may look tasty now, but I assure you it carps just like all the rest of us. - Matty Malaprop