rhyming

Don't let them tell you otherwise; every ditch in the world just lives to suck... shocks. Yeah, that's the word I was looking for. - Matty Malaprop

Better to be on the celibate end of a clock block than have your lady be late, amirite? - Matty Malaprop

Looks to me like Brian Wilson really cleaned up his act! - Matty Malaprop

Somnambulance has never seemed so serious. - Matty Malaprop

On today's episode of "I'd Watch This Movie," we are treated to a gritty, gangbanger thriller between rival coke-running sects The Ants and the Grasshoppers. There's also musical numbers and a less-than-subtle Shakespearean streak going on throughout the filmOH WAIT NOW I'M JUST TALKING ABOUT "WEST SIDE STORY" AGAIN. - Matty Malaprop

As Gotye's better half (in that video at least) would say, I really hope these endless "Somebody That I Used To Know" puns eventually Settle Down. - Matty Malaprop

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They call her Antoinette Montana. I suggest you do not f*ck with her. - Matty Malaprop

... because much like a desert, the Bloodhound Gang's discovery is mostly devoid of life and appeal. HEYO! - Matty Malaprop

Honestly, my least favorite part is Snape. I know he means well, but he always comes off as a bit of an ass. Ron's quite a stallion, though, so I guess that makes everything better. - Matty Malaprop

I disagree profusely with this pun on the grounds that I find it impossible to feel blue when the Nyan Cat song is playing. - Matty Malaprop

Awwww, cheer up Vlad! You've got a whole day devoted to you, so how could you possibly be sad? - Matty Malaprop

Prease rike this photo!

You really couldn't ask for a better receptionist though. He always talks in a way that brings Joseph Gordon-Levitty to everyone's day! - Matty Malaprop