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Understanding the nuances of the letter R in the pirate lexicon is really an ARRRRRRRRRtform in and of itself. - Matty Malaprop

Hmmm... now I'm just wondering the best way to graphically depict rooibos... - Matty Malaprop

Just 20 minutes every day, and your muscles will be Blooming in no time! And your figure will doubtless take on a whole new Depp! - Matty Malaprop

Source: Worth1000

The A-Team? More like the HEYO!-Team, amirite?

Poetry and prose AND GO-GO BOOTS? Quoth my paycheck: "Nevermore." - Matty Malaprop

It's a prefix turned punchline... MIND = BLOWN. - Matty Malaprop

Hive half a mind to contest this statement, but I can't deny the love I feel whenever I look into my honey's eyes. - Matty Malaprop

Source: Pictures and Bad Puns

It might not be the most riveting story in the universe, but it certainly is a shoo-in for the most paternal. - Matty Malaprop

I apologize for the Skrillex overload on the site of late... so here's some palate-cleansing "dubstep" for you. - Matty Malaprop

[youtube="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCmhPydD7zw"]

But unlike post-its, breasticles are generally quite difficult to overlook. - Matty Malaprop

Zeus must be so proud; his lil' boy just graduated with an MS in PUNCHING DEMONS IN THE FACE. - Matty Malaprop

I mean, sure, this isn't how the business cat meme works at all, but maybe the OP was just high on nip? - Matty Malaprop

Trufax: Sign "i"s cost $12.50 a piece. Sign periods cost a dollar just! - Matty Malaprop

One percent of people notice 99 percent of all grammar and spelling errors on the interwebs. #OccupyMerriam-Webster - Matty Malaprop