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Trufax: Sign "i"s cost $12.50 a piece. Sign periods cost a dollar just! - Matty Malaprop

Unless that's an awkwardly shaped piece of cinnamon in a cup of cocoa, I'm not particularly interested. Thanks for the offer though, I guess. - Matty Malaprop

I wanna hold your... paw? - Matty Malaprop

Just don't make him the wrong kind of smoothy. I hear if you do that, he'll punish you by taking away your blending forever. - Matty Malaprop

Just don't try and argue with the man, unless you want to magically "disappear" quicker than a Che of light. - Matty Malaprop

... or maybe it's just a spoonfulerism, because I eat both for breakfast every morning. - Matty Malaprop

I mean, sure, this isn't how the business cat meme works at all, but maybe the OP was just high on nip? - Matty Malaprop

Leave the eyebrow rings to the street punks in the U.K., will ya Pierce? - Matty Malaprop

Poetry and prose AND GO-GO BOOTS? Quoth my paycheck: "Nevermore." - Matty Malaprop

Hive half a mind to contest this statement, but I can't deny the love I feel whenever I look into my honey's eyes. - Matty Malaprop

Source: Pictures and Bad Puns

It's in the Bible, folks, so it has to be true. - Matty Malaprop

I apologize for the Skrillex overload on the site of late... so here's some palate-cleansing "dubstep" for you. - Matty Malaprop

[youtube="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCmhPydD7zw"]