house

... which I guess means his first child will be Mini House? - Matty Malaprop

(W)Hose to say why this house is so happy? I'm certainly blinds as to the reason. - Matty Malaprop

Not to be picky... but isn't this haus closer to the curb than the middle of the street? I think the song a lot less catchy... #puncrusher - Matty Malaprop

My entreaty is true either way, though I suppose the context is radically altered in each instance... - Matty Malaprop

By fun, do you perhaps mean "the stuff nightmares are made of?" - Matty Malaprop

Nothing to sort here, hat. Move along. - Matty Malaprop

The man has a doctorate in making people laugh, you know. - Matty Malaprop

Sure, he uses a cane, but that doesn't mean he can't dance Hugh under the table! - Matty Malaprop

As my Colorado friends often remind me, this kind of thing is what they call "just another day in Boulder." - Matty Malaprop

And it was precisely then that poor little Susie developed her longstanding case of Iatrophobia. - Matty Malaprop

Thanks punmaster Magician_at_large for finding the source for this comic!

I'd stay away from that truck if I were you; you might contract lupus if you touch it. - Matty Malaprop

Screw that one house with the badgers. And that one with the griffins. And especially that one with the snakes. This is clearly the best option. - Matty Malaprop

Oh, I'm sorry, you were expecting me to foot your bill? How droll! - Matty Malaprop

And when he dies and is cremated, everyone will pull a genre-based 180 and somberly sing "Burning Down the House" in his honor. - Matty Malaprop