computer

I always end up having to take it in for repairs. I tried doing it myself once, but I'm just terrible at picking up new skills cold. - Matty Malaprop

That sort of thing happens to the best of us, believe me. It's enough to make you RAM your head against the wall, though. - Matty Malaprop

I guess you're just going to have to learn to control your emotions and find some alt means of coping. - Matty Malaprop

At least it's unmistakably an apple computer. - Matty Malaprop

... but sadly in good ol' Montucky it's illegal to keep magpies as pets. And no, I'm not making that up. - Matty Malaprop

Do these jeans make my tail look big? - Matty Malaprop

It may have come 74 games later in the series, but discerning players all knew the second they played it that "The Elder Scrolls: Alzheimers" was really the spiritual successor to "Oblivion." - Matty Malaprop

I can tell by the leotard and also by the perfect form she's demonstrating with that flip. - Matty Malaprop

The facepalm felt from a groaner hurts. The facepalm felt from a groaner-gone-unnoticed hurts more than anything else in the world. - Matty Malaprop

Why does this pasta taste like apples... ??? - Matty Malaprop

I have a confession to make, everyone; my infinite neuroses and perpetual state of nervousness have branded me a lifelong nail biter. The only upside: I'll never have to worry about circuit-breaking a nail. - Matty Malaprop

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