comparison

Too late, I already did! - Matty Malaprop

My family is French, so I'll put it another way. Ma famille est comme un derrière: serré. - Matty Malaprop

More cute cross-stitching over here!

What a pear these two argumentative chaps make... - Matty Malaprop

But unlike post-its, breasticles are generally quite difficult to overlook. - Matty Malaprop

And to think, were it not for the lynx they established via his text messages, he would have gotten away with being a cheetah! - Matty Malaprop

Yo Naga, I'mma let you finish, but Magic: The Gathering merfolk circa Lorwyn block were the best fish-people things of all time. OF ALL TIME! - Matty Malaprop

I just hope this intrepid cube doesn't melt under all the pressure. - Matty Malaprop

Given the age of Facebook at this point, I wouldn't exactly call Zuckerberg an entrepreneur. Maybe an entrepremiddleaged? - Matty Malaprop

No, seriously, is it? Because I'll totally shill out four bucks for a weak bottle of Teachers, and that sh*t ain't even good! - Matty Malaprop

First he was a space traveler, then he was an archaeologist, and soon he'll be a cowboy... but he'll always be HARRISON F*ING FORD. - Matty Malaprop