To Mr. Fear's credit, he's a very cordial guest who makes some really fabulous finger sandwiches. - Matty Malaprop
As someone who's always fancied himself as a bit of a peripatetic thinker, this kind of pun really resonates with me. - Matty Malaprop
The secret to successful relationships is always holding yourself with the utmost confidence. - Matty Malaprop
Can we please just go back to mono-fart jokes as the de fact form of lowbrow entertainment? Please??? - Matty Malaprop
One of them murders innocent children and keeps your hands cozy and warm. The other is actually called a birdie and is loved by many many high school athletes in Hong Kong. The line's a little blurry, really. - Matty Malaprop
Barbacoa's: Where confession and concession meet in holy meltrimony. - Matty Malaprop
This is eggsactly the thing I needed to brighten my otherwise dreary day! - Matty Malaprop