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"Not My Job" Moments Of Dubious Professionalism

Different job titles have different goals, but at their heart, every worker has the same goal: do as little work as possible without getting fired. Our universal desire to not try all that hard leads us down some strange paths, like these "not my job" moments of professional ineptitude. Who needs straight road lines anyway? People get up to some real quality moments of unprofessionalism.

funny "not my job" fails
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Strange and Cursed Images To Feel Weird About

Cursed Images are a good reminder of how lost and repulsed we can be by random images with zero context. You could call it something like a sensory response to cognitive estrangement. You could also call it "being disgusted by seeing a bowl of pennies filled with milk." Little of column A, a lot of column B.

weird cursed images
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Obnoxious Humble Brags From Righteous Folks

Humble brags are the bane of our collective existence. Nothing quite grinds one's gears like having to bear witness to someone proclaiming from their high horse that they have committed an act of profound, soul-stirring beauty. It's like, we get it...you're a good person. Sometimes, the best way to spread that charitable kindness is to do so from a place of humbleness. 

A collection of painfully obnoxious humble brags.
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Ex Sets Ridiculous Ultimatum, Ends Up With Empty Apartment

If this guy hadn't tried to soft-rob his ex, he might just have some dish soap left, but nah, he got big about it and ended up with a totally empty apartment. It's gotta feel good to take literally everything that belongs to you, kind of like a Pharaoh. For some lighter relationship struggles, here are the many frustrating habits of people's spouses. Ultimatums are often a bad idea, like this jerkbag who gave a server an ultimatum and ended up having to pay for 25 beers.

Ex boyfriend says he'll own anything ex girlfriend doesn't take, she takes everything
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Road Rager Picks On Motorcycle, Rider Gets Revenge

Some people refuse to keep their tempers in check when they get on the road. This only ever breeds more chaos and stress for everyone else that's just trying to get around. In this case, we have a crazy, angry driver who seemed like he was poised to have a meltdown over something, from the moment he got behind the wheel. Well, he certainly met his match in this motorcycle driver. The motorcyclist cut the road rager zero slack, and proceeded to stall him right into a hopeless puddle of rage. 

A road rager picks on a motorcycle driver, driver takes petty revenge | r/pettyrevenge Join u/Fluffy-Designer Small motorbike vs small waves pinky finger should preface this by saying raised by narcissist and extremely passive-aggressive as result. Years ago bought my first motorbike tiny 125CC bike with my 82kg body weight, could barely do 90km/h on flat road and would lose speed going up hills despite revving as hard as could my first motorbike and loved her with my whole heart.
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People's "No One is Gonna Believe This" Moments

It's hard when something extremely strange or unlikely happens, because you want to tell someone without sounding like a liar or moron. People are right to be skeptical, but why would anyone lie about walking in on a vested goat eating a roll of toilet paper? You've got moments like these strange events people can't explain logically that make you think, "how am I gonna tell anyone about this?" It's so hard to explain rare and unlikely moments that went against the odds. 

unlikely and weird stories | visions1013 14 hours ago saw bird unscrew lightbulb once.
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Cringey Brain-Lords Trying Way Too Hard to Seem Intelligent

Being able to squawk about your perceived achievements and intelligence is one of the unfortunate byproducts of social media. It's given a chance for Brain-Tyrants who believe they're literal geniuses to spread their wings and fly into the ceiling fan of self-congratulation. Thanks for clogging up the internet, you mistaken brain-lords.

social media posts from people who think they're brilliant | SHOULD DISCLOSE MY IQ MY MANAGER afraid l'll trigger some insecurity him and he'll start looking reasons get rid Whenever he assigns task, he acts proud himself thinking he's keeping busy next few weeks. He actually looks disappointed done with assignment by following morning. He can't keep busy, and seem be frustrating him because My IQ test came back with score 146, higher than 99.9 population can be really dumb many areas, but
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